Troy - 20th Anniversary Review "HECTOR!!!!!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So, its time for another post and this one is yet another revisit but its actually in a way a themed one, which will be a revisit of the historical epic war film, Troy starring Brad Pitt, which celebrates its 20th anniversary this year, so thought I would give it another look.

And with that said, let's take another at this historical epic 20 years on from its release and see how it fares...

So, the usual warning is coming...

PLOT SPOILERS ARE AHEAD!!!

STORY  

So the story begins with prince Hector of Troy (Eric Bana) and his younger brother Paris (Orlando Bloom) signing a peace treaty with Menelaus (Brendan Gleason) the king of Sparta and celebrate the end of a long bloody war.  Paris however has been having a secret love affair with Menelaus's young and beautiful wife, Helen of Sparta (Diane Kruger) and he smuggles her aboard their homebound ship much to the anger of Hector who says this could lead to war between Troy and Greece.  

Menelaus is outraged to find his wife missing and then goes to see his older brother, the ruthless King Agamemnon (Brian Cox) and asks for his help to take Troy over, who agrees as he has been wanting to conquer Troy for a long time so he can take control of the Aegean sea.  One of the Greek kings, Odysseus (Sean Bean) pays a visit to the legendary Greek warrior Achilles (Brad Pitt) asking him to join the fight, however Achilles is initially reluctant as he despises Agamemnon and dislikes his ways.  Achilles however soon changes his mind after he speaks to his mother, Thetis (Julie Christie) who tells him that if he goes to fight his name will be remembered throughout the ages but he will never return home.

Meanwhile in Troy, King Priam (Peter O'Toole) greets Hector and Paris even though he is initially dismayed at Helen's presence he welcomes her and allows her to stay as he realises if they sent her home then Paris would likely follow her and be killed so instead decides that the Trojans should engage the Greeks in battle.  The Greeks arrive soon after and take the beach, mainly with the help of Achilles and his Myrmidons (warriors who trained and served under Achilles) who also travels along with his cousin Patroclus (Garrett Hedlund) who Achilles is very protective of and refuses to let him fight. 

Achilles and his men soon sack the temple of Apollo and are then confronted by Hector and his Trojan troops  but Achilles tells Hector to go and return to the city, which he does.  Achilles later claims a Trojan priestess, Briseis (Rose Byrne) but Agamemnon takes her from Achilles out of spite which angers Achilles who then refuses to help Agamemnon continue their fight against Troy.

The next day the Trojans and Greeks meet outside the walls of Troy and Hector and Paris face Agamemnon and Menelaus and Hector remains defiant against Agamemnon's wishes to call on Troy's army whenever he wishes.  Paris however offers to take on Menelaus in combat for the right to take Helen to end the war, which Menelaus appears to agree with but quietly tells Agamemnon to attack after he has killed Paris.  

Paris and Menelaus then engage in combat but Menelaus quickly overpowers him and as he is about to kill Paris, Paris crawls back to Hector who kills Menelaus, after this Agamemnon engages his army in battle with the Trojans but they are overwhelmed by the Trojan's defences and are forced to retreat.  Agamemenon later is forced to try and make peace with Achilles at the insistance of two of his fellow Kings, Odysseus and Nestor (John Shrapnel).  Agamemnon however has given Briseis to the men who attempt to rape her but are stopped by Achilles who rescues her and takes her back to his tent where they fall for one another.

The next day Achilles continues to refuse to fight for Agamemnon despite Odysseus's best efforts, but during the following night the Trojans launch an attack on the Greeks using fireballs.  The Trojans however are buoyed by the appearance of Achilles who engages in hand to hand combat with Hector only to have his throat cut.  Hector however on removing his opponent's helmet discovers it is Patroclus and not Achilles and out of mercy kills him to end his suffering.  

As a result of this Achilles is enraged and then goes to face Hector in combat himself, which after an a mostly even battle, Achilles eventually gains the upper hand and kills Hector and proceeds to tie and drag his body behind his chariot back to Greek base. King Priam later discreetly visits Achilles at night and asks that he allow him to take Hector's body back and that he give his son the proper burial rites and rituals, which out of respect, Achilles agrees to which means for 12 days no Greek will attack Troy.  

However during this time the Greeks use this time to create a strategy to invade Troy from within, as Odysseus has his men construct a large wooden horse, which Pream takes a gift from the Gods and has it wheeled it into the city gates. So, from here, its leads into the film's climax with the Greeks emerging from inside the horse to carry out their plan to sack Troy...

THOUGHTS 

As a historical epic war film, Troy is very entertaining and it largely succeeds in telling the story of Homer's Illiad, which narrated the story of the 10 year Trojan war although it did receive some criticism from historians for being inaccurate in its depiction of the epic poem itself.  The film is visually stunning and made an impressive scale which is understandable given its 175 million dollar budget.  Troy was however in addition to its original theatrical release also had a director's cut as well which clocked in at 196 minutes, which was 34 minutes longer than the theatrical release which expands on certain scenes particularly the battle scenes and the sacking of Troy, although I would say my preference would be the original cut myself.

PERFORMANCES AND NOTABLE SCENES (Warning: this section may contain spoilers!)

Performance wise Troy is also largely quite impressive with most of the cast on excellent form.

Starting with Brad Pitt who excels at playing the muscular role of Achilles and he effortlessly handles the film intense action scenes.  And even though Brad's accent seems to go on a bit of a walkabout at times between being English and American he still effectively delivers his dialogue. 

Brad's highlights in the film which include the scene near the start of the film where Achilles is awoken by a young boy messanger (who I could swear was a girl!) who tells him that Agememnon has requested  him to do battle.  And in the scene the young boy says to Achilles "That Thessalian, he's the biggest man I've ever seen!  I wouldn't want to fight him" and Achilles says "And that is why no one will remember your name". 

Then in the next scene, Achilles confronts a giant Thessalian warrior champion, Boagrius (Nathan Jones) and before he fights him, he has a little verbal spat with Agamemnon and says to him "Perhps YOU should fight him!". So, Achille relcutantly decides to go ahead with the fight and says to himself "Imagine a king that fights his own battles! Wouldn't that be a sight!" and he slams his spear into the ground (confident he doesn't need it).  

So as Achilles fights Boagrius, he takes him out with one swing of his sword and he then goes over to the Thessalian army and shouts "IS THERE NO ONE ELSE??!!" and is met with a stoney silence. Boagrius's defeated king, Triopas, stunned asks Achilles "What's your name, solider?" and Achilles says "Achilles, son of Pelius" and Triopas tells him "I will remember the name" and he holds out a sceptre to him and says "Take this to your king" and Achilles defiantly says to him "He's not my king" and walks off. 

Another good scene comes when Achilles meets reluctantly with Agamemnon and as the two begins the scene together, Achilles refers to their successful sacking of the temple "Apparently you won some great victory". Agamemnon arrogantly says to him "Perhaps you didn't notice. The beach belonged Priam in the morning. It belongs to Agamemnon in the afternoon" and Achilles unimpressed tells him "You can have the beach. I didn't come here for sand!". Agamemnon then tells Achilles "No, you wanted to come here because you want your name to last throughout the ages!". 

Agamemnon then goads Achilles by bringing in Briseis, who Achilles had brought to his tent earlier after the sacking of the temple and Achilles warns Aga's men to let her go. So, he warns them "No argument with you, brothers! But if you don't release her, you'll never see home again! Decide!". Agamemnon then grabs Briseis and goads Achilles further and says to him "Mighty Achilles, silenced by a slave girl. Tonight I'll have her give me a bath, and then, who knows?!". Achilles by now is furious and he points his sword at Agamemnon and shouts "You sack of wine!  Before my time is done I will look down on your corpse and smile!".  

Then there is the scene where Achilles confronts Hector in battle after he arrives in his chariot he yells out "HECTOR!" repeatedly until Hector comes down to face him.  And in the scene Achilles starts by removing his helmet and says "Now YOU know who you are fighting!" and he continues on by saying "You won't have eyes tonight; you won't have ears or a tongue. You will wander the underworld blind, deaf, and dumb, and all the dead will know: This is Hector. The fool who thought he killed Achilles!".   

And last of all is the scene where Priam meets with Achilles at night in his tent on the beach and pleads with him to give his son, Hector back to him, so he can have a proper funeral. So, Achilles in the scene says to Priam "Even if I do give him back to you, it doesn't change anything, you are still my enemy in the morning". Priam however then says "You are still my enemy tonight but even enemies can show respect". Achilles then takes a moment and says "I admire your courage. Wait for a moment and meet me outside". 

So, outside Achilles goes over to Hector's body and sobs and says to him "We will meet again soon, brother" and covers him over. So, Achilles then returns to Piram and tells him "Your son was the best I've fought. The funeral games last for 12 days in my country" and Priam says "They are the same in mine". So, Achilles then says "Then it is settled, no Greek shall attack Troy for 12 days" and as Achilles agrees for Briseis to go back with Priam, he says to him "You are a much better King than the one that leads this army" i.e. referring to Agememon.  

Eric Bana is also very good in his role as Hector, the brave and heroic prize warrior of Troy who get's embroiled in war with Greece.  

Bana also has some good moments such as the scene where Paris reveals to him that he smuggled Helen onboard their ship and Hector angrily orders his ship to be turned back for Sparta to return her.

So, as they argue, Paris says "If you want to take Helen back to Sparta, so be it, but I go with her" and Hector says "To Sparta?! They'll kill you!". So, Paris naively says to his brother "Then, I'll die fighting!" and Hector angrily says to him "Oh, and that sounds heroic to you, doesn't it? To die fighting. Little brother, have you ever killed a man?" and Paris says "No" and Hector asks again "Ever seen a man die in combat?" and Paris again says "No" and Hector angrily tells him "Well, I've killed men, and I've heard them dying. And I've watched them dying. And there's nothing glorious about it! Nothing poetic! You say you want to die for love. You know nothing about dying and you know nothing about love!". Paris then says "All the same, I go with her. I won't you ask to fight my war" but Hector bitterly says to him "You already have!" and tells his men to set sail instead for Troy.    

Then there is the scene where Hector faces Agamemnon and tells him "You want me to look upon your army and tremble? Well I see them. I see 50,000 men brought here to fight for one man's greed!".  And as Aga warns him that his mercy has its limits Hector angrily says "And I've seen the limits of your mercy and I tell you now, no son of Troy will ever submit to a foreign ruler!" and Agamenon cruelly says to him "Then ever son of Troy shall die!". Paris however at this point interrupts and makes an offer to fight for Helen against Menelaus, who accepts the offer to fight Paris. Paris then anxiously tells Hector "If I fall tell Helen...tell her..." and Hector grabs him and says to him "You think of his sword and yours and nothing else!". 

Another good scene for Bana is Hector's fight scene with Achilles were Hector starts off by saying to Achilles saying " I've seen this moment in my dreams. I'll make a pact with you. With the gods as our witnesses, let us pledge that the winner will allow the loser all the proper funeral rituals" and Achilles defiantly says "There are no pacts between lions and men!" and he removes his helmet and says "Now you know who you are fighting!". Hector then regretfully says to Achilles "I thought it was you I was fighting yesterday. And I wish it had been, but I gave the dead boy the honor he deserved".  

As for the other cast members, Diane Kruger is excellent in her role as Helen of Troy/Sparta who engages in an extremely costly love affair with Paris.  

Kruger also has some good moments in the film which include the scene where Paris sneaks in and meets with Helen near the start of the film and he tells her not to be afraid of her husband Menelaus and she says "I'm not afraid of dying, I'm afraid of tomorrow. I'm afraid of watching you sail away and knowing you'll never come back".  

And then later there is the scene where Paris tries to offer an alternative to Helen to try and prevent the Greeks going to war with Troy.  And he naively says regarding Menelaus "Then I will walk right up to your husband and tell him that your mine!" and Helen kisses him and says "You are very young my love".  

And later on as Helen desparately tries to leave Troy during the night, Hector stops her before she can and sobs at the hopelessness of her situation. So, Hector spots Helen in the scene wearing a cloak and he runs after her and shouts "Helen! Wait!" and he grabs her and she cries. So, Helen tearfully tells Hector "I saw them burn. I saw them burning on the pyres. That's my fault. It is. You know it is. All those widows. I still hear them screaming. Their husbands died because I'm here. I'm going down to the ships". Helen then says to Hector "I'm giving myself back to Menelaus" but Hector tells her "It's too late for that. Do you think Agamemnon cares about his brother's marriage? This is about power. Not love!". Helen however says to Hector "I can't ask anyone to fight for me" but Hector tries to encourage her by saying "Your princess of Troy now and my brother needs you tonight".

Orlando Bloom however is the weak link in the cast here as Paris and while he is not a terrible actor by any means, he's that great here either, as I usually nickname him Orlando Bland (sorry!). All the same, this is still a fairly decent performance from Bloom all things considered but its no real different than listening to him as the Elf warrior in the Lord of the Rings.

Still, I will mention one of his scenes where Paris decides to try and end the bloody conflict between the Trojans and the Greeks by challenging Menelaus in one on one combat for the right to Helen.

So, in the scene, Paris during a meeting with high ranking officials and Prias and Hector, Paris says to them "There won't be a war. This is not a conflict of nations. It is a dispute between two men. I don't want to see another Trojan die because of me. Tomorrow morning, I will challenge Menelaus for the right to Helen. The winner will take her home. The loser will burn before nightfall!". 

And after the meeting, Paris speaks to his father, Prias "Father…I'm sorry for the pain I've caused you"
and Prias asks him "Do you love her?" and Paris tell him "You are a great king because you love your country so much. Every blade of grass. Every grain of sand. Every rock in the river. You love all of Troy. That is the way I love Helen". 

Brian Cox is also excellent as the ruthless and power hungry king Agamemnon who is determined to conquer Troy.  

Cox also has quite a few highlights in the film which include the scene where Aga (call him that for short!) meets with Achilles and taunts him by bringing Briseis in front of him and saying to Achilles "The spoils of war!" which enrages Achilles who warns the men to let her go or he will kill them and Agamemnon gloats and says "Mighty Achilles, silenced by a slave girl. Tonight I'll have her give me a bath, and then, who knows?!".  

Another good scene is when Aga confronts Hector and Paris outside the city walls of Troy and he says to them ""I see you're not hiding behind your high walls. Valiant of you. Ill-advised, but valiant. And he then states his demands to Hector "I have two wishes. If you grant them, no more of your people need die. First, you must give Helen back to my brother. Second, Troy must submit to my command, to fight for me whenever I call".  And as Hector defies Aga's wishes, Aga nastily says to him "Then every son of Troy, shall die!".

And lastly there is the scene where after Agamemnon's initial attack on Troy's walls fails, he is back at his tent later on, ranting at his failure and one of the kings, Odysseus (who Achilles trusts) insists he must make peace with Achilles. 

So, he shouts at Odysseus "Achilles is just one man!" and Odysseus shouts "Hector is just one man and look at what he did to us today!" and Agamemnon shouts back ""Hector fights for his country! Achilles fights only for himself!". Odysseus however angrily shouts at Agamemnon "I don't care about the man's allegiances, I care about his ability to win battles!". Agamemnon then rants ""Even if I could make peace with Achilles, the man won't listen to me! He's as likely to spear me as to speak to me!" but Odysseus tells him "I'll talk to him. He'll want the girl back" meaning Briesis. So, after Odysseus asks where she is, Agamemnon wearily tells him "I gave her to the men. They need some amusement after today!".  

Sean Bean is also very good in his role as the wise King Odysseus, the only man whom Achilles will listen to.  

Bean has some good scenes as well such as the scene where Another good scene comes when Odysseus visits Achilles near the start of the film and Achilles throws his spear into a tree quite near him and Odysseus smiles saying "Your reptuation for hospitality is fast becoming legend!" and tries to persuade Achilles to fight for Greece again in taking Troy he says "This war will never be forgotten, nor will the heroes who fight in it".

Odysseus and Nestor try to persuade Agamemnon to get Achilles back on their side to help them take Troy and as Aga shouts "Achilles is just one man!" and Odysseus shouts "Hector is just one man and look at what he did to us today!" and Agamemnon shouts back ""Hector fights for his country! Achilles fights only for himself!" Odysseus says " I don't care about the man's alliegence, I care about his ability to win battles!".  

And last of all is the scene where Hector unwittingly kills Patroclus in battle, as he presumed he was facing Achilles (who was wearing Achilles body armour and helmet). So, in the scene after Hector kills Patroclus out of mercy, Hector feeling remorse having killed Patroclus says "No more fighting today" and Odysseys agrees and says of Achilles "It was his cousin". Then Eudorus (Vincent Regan) Achille's second in command looks down on Patroclus's body and says "We were going to sail home today" and Oydsseus grimly says "No one is going home now".   

And the last few I will quickly mention Rose Byrne who is good in her role as the priestess, Briseis who becomes romantically attached to Achilles.

So, I will mention just one of her scenes, which is the one where Briseis has been captured and taken to Achilles tent. 

So, in the scene, Briesis remains quiet as Achilles removes his armour and washes himself and he asks her "What's your name?" but she remains silent and Achilles asks "Did you not hear me?" and Briseis angrily tells him "You killed Apollo's priests!" but Achilles says to her "I've killed men in five countries but never a priest!". Briseis then spitefully says to Achilles "Then your men did! The sun god will have his vengeance!" and Achilles warily tells her "What is he waiting for?" and she says to him "The right time to strike!". Briseis then angrily shouts at Achilles "You're nothing but a killer! You know nothing about the Gods!" but Achilles says to her he knows more about them than she does and asks her name again and says to her "You're royalty, aren't you? You spent your life talking down to men!". 

Achilles asks her name again "Even servants of Apollo have names" and she tells him "Briseis" and he asks her "Are you afraid, Briseis?" and she asks him "Should I be?". However, they are briefly interrupted by Eudorous, his second in command and after he leave, Achilles says to her at the end of the scene "You don't need to fear me, girl. You're the only Trojan that can say that".  

Saffron Burrows is also pretty good (and pretty) in the part of Hector's wife, Andromach although she isn't given much of a role in the film, which is a pity. 

However, I will mention one of Saffron's scenes which is the one where Andromache pleads with Hector to not fight against the Greeks.

So, in the scene, Hector recalls his surprise at Achilles skill as a warrior and says "The man who killed Tecton outside Apollo's temple, I've never seen a spear thrown like that". Andromache is more worried about Hector however and pleads with him "Don't go tomorrow. Please don't go" but Hector reassures her "Paris fights tomorrow, not me" however Andromache warns him "Fifty thousand Greeks didn't cross the sea…to watch your brother fight. You know this" and Hector tries to smile and says "You'd make a fine general, my love". Andromache continues to beg him "You've been fighting your whole life. Let other men do battle this time" and Hector tells her "You know I don't want to fight. I want to see my son grow tall.I want to see the girls chasing after him" but Andromache becomes more emotional and says to him "I can't lose you. I won't survive".

Peter O'Toole is also pretty good in the film even if his performance is somewhat hammy as King Priam and there is an amusing scene in the director's cut (or rather unintentionally so!) where Priam faints in shock after witnessing Achilles kill his son Hector.  

O'Toole also has some good lines in the film as well such as in the scene where Paris brings Helen home and Priam greets her. So, in the scene, Paris introduces Helen "Father, this is Helen" and Priam asks in surprise "Helen of Sparta?" and Paris tells him "Helen of Troy" and Priam gracefully says to her "I have heard rumors of your beauty. And for once, the gossip is right!" and he kisses her welcomingly on both cheeks. 

WARNING: BIG SPOILER IN THE NEXT PARAGRAPH!

And lastly, I will mention the scene where Priam pays a sneaky visit to Achilles's tent the night after Achilles kills Hector in a one on one fight for revenge over Patroclus's death. 

So, in the scene enters his tent to see Priam and Achilles asks him "Who are you?" and Priam emotionally says "I have endured what no one on earth has endured before. I kissed the hands of the man who killed my son". Achilles then realises who he is and asks "How did you get in here?" and Priam tells him "I think I know my land better than the Greeks do and Achilles says to him "You're a brave man. I could have had your head on a spit in the blink of an eye". Priam however remains somewhat defiant of Achilles warning and says to him "Do you really think death frightens me now? I watched my eldest son die, watched you drag his body behind your chariot. Give him back to me. He deserves a proper burial, you know that. Give him to me". Achilles however is unwilling and tells Priam "He killed my cousin" and Priam says to him "He thought it was you. How many cousins have you killed? How many sons and fathers and brothers and husbands? How many, brave Achilles?".

So, after some time in the scene, Achilles appears to swayed by Priam's words and relents and allows him to take back Hector's body. However, Achilles warns Priam "I admire your courage. But even if I give you him back, you're still my enemy in the morning" and Priam tells Achilles "You're still my enemy tonight but even enemies can show respect".

And last of all is Brendan Gleason who is great in his role as King Menelaus who is out for revenge after his wife, Helen, leaves him for Paris.  

And Gleason also has some good moments especially the scene where Menelaus fights with Paris and in the scene before they fight Menelaus says to Paris "I accept your challenge and tonight I shall drink to your bones!". So, as the two of them begin to fight, its pretty clear that Menelaus has the upper hand is too experienced and strong a warrior for Paris.  

So as Menelaus beats Paris and knocks him to the crowd, having slashed his leg, he moves into kill Paris and teases him by saying "See the crowes, they've never tasted prince before!".  And Paris suddenly get's up and runs away leaving Menelaus disgusted, he shouts up at Helen "IS THIS WHAT YOU LEFT ME FOR???!!!". And as Paris crawls away, Menelaus shouts after him disgusted "FIGHT ME! YOU COWARD! FIGHT ME! WE HAVE A PACT!". 

Paris then crawls over to Hector and desparately holds onto him as Menelaus rants at them both "This is NOT honor! This is not worthy of ROYALTY! If he doesn't fight, Troy is doomed!" but Hector firmly tells Menelaus "The fight is over!". Menelaus however remains defiant and shouts "The fight is NOT over! Stand back, Prince Hector! I'll kill him at your feet! I don't care!" but Hector angrily spits back "He is MY brother!". So, as Menelaus makes to kill Paris, Hector quickly takes out his sword and stabs Menelaus right through the chest, who soon collapses and dies leaving his brother, Agamemnon enraged as they launch their attack on Troy (unsuccessfully at this point though!).

DIRECTOR AND MUSIC 

Finally moving onto the director, Wolfgang Petersen who does a fine job in keeping the story moving along despite the film's length it never really lags too much (although the director's cut is just a bit too long at nearly 3 hours and 20 minutes!).  Petersen also confidently handles the film's epic and bloody battle scenes very well as they well staged and Achilles and Hector's fight is also well done, which does last just over 3 minutes but its certainly alot longer than all of Achilles other battles in the film! So overall, Petersen does an excellent job here with the film.  

The film also features a very good score by the late James Horner although it does appear he has nicked the odd moment or two from Maurice Jarre's Lawrence of Arabia score here and there! However, the score still has a very impressive grandiose feel to it and it is very suited to the period and tone of the film itself. Horner himself interestingly enough was a late replacement for another composer, Gabriel Yared, who's score gathered a negative response during the film's test screening, so Horner composed the film's score within just 4 weeks. Horner himself tragically died later in 2015 in a plane crash, as he was manning a small aircraft that crashed in California, he was aged 61. 

FLAWS (Warning: this section may contain spoilers!)

As for Troy's flaws.... its not quite a perfect film of course and there are some niggles. For a start the film's dialogue at times is pretty cringeworthy for an epic you do get some almost obligatory cheesy lines for the actors to chew on and here Troy is no exception!  

And there are a few wopppers here and there but the worst one comes from Eric Bana when he tells his wife sadly that he must face Achilles and he says "I want live in peace, grow old and I want to see my boy grow and watch him chase the girls!".  And another cracker comes from Orlando Bloom when Paris says to his father King Priam "You are such a great King because the way you love all your lands.  And that is the way in which I love Helen!". Uggghhhh!!

Another issue I had with the film was more to do with the director's cut which does add some rather unecessary moments here and there I also felt the sacking of Troy was suddenly made far more graphically violent which I found a bit off-putting.  Some of the film's battle scenes in the director's cut were also made a bit more bloody and violent than necessary in certain moments as well.  And yes as I previously mentioned the director's cut in general is just a bit too long!  

I was also a little disppointed in a way by how the fight scene ultimately ended between Achilles and Hector where Achilles doesn't even get as much as a scratch (except on his armour) against Hector and I was hoping he would have sustained some sort of injury to make the battle that bit more even than it was.  However Achilles ultimaltey met his own demise at his heel as we all know!   

And now for the film's biggest flaw, well for me anyway, which comes in the scene when the Trojans launch an attack on the beach by firing large fireballs at the Greeks.  And earlier in the film Achilles had a fallout with Agamemnon and as a result refused to fight for him.  OK.  So that in mind when the big fireballs are rolling down on the beech and all the men are screaming and flailing about and there is lot of noise, Achilles does not ONCE bother to step out of his tent to find out what is going on!!!  And he doesn't step outside until the next morning only by then to find that there are quite a few casualties including his cousin Patroclus! 

Now if I were Achilles, the greatest warrior of all time and there was all that commotion going on I think I would even take a peak outside just to see what the hell was going on! And for me it remains the silliest part of the film which makes little sense especially as many Greek soldiers died as a result as well as Patroclus and if Achilles had bothered to take his selfish ass outside and fight then he might have prevented Patroclus's death and ultimately wouldn't have needed to fought and killed Hector.  But hey that's allegedy how the story went, but personally I think its just a daft scene.  

HISTORICAL INACCURACIES (OR GREEK MYTHIOLOGICAL INACCURACIES!) 

And I can't finish without saying something about the inaccuracies in the film's depiction of Homer's Illiad as there are indeed quite a few shown here. 

For starters, the film depicts the war as being quite short but in accordance to Illiad, the Greek Tojan war actually lasted over a period of 10 years but we certainly don't get that in the film, as its appears to be over the space of a few weeks! So, yeah a bit of a devitation from Homer's text right there it has to be said! ;-) 

Another inaccracy is in the depiction of Achilles and Patroclus's relationship to each other as cousins, as they are cousins in th film. However, in the texts of the Illiad it never states that they were cousins as such and implies they were in fact lovers. Also in the Illiad, Achilles is depcited in his rage of going on a killing rampage, rather than just simply heading to challenge Hector in combat. 

Then there is the depiction of the battle between Achilles and Hector, which is a reasonably lengthy and competitive fight in the movie. However, in the Illiad text, Achilles chases Hector around the walls of Troy three times before Hector finally decides to accept his fate and challenge Achilles in combat. Hector then instead of having a pitch battle with Achilles, simply charges at Achilles with his sword and misses and then pleads with Achilles to give him a proper funeral, which Achilles refuses to and proceeds to kill Hector and drag his body behind chariot, which is depicted in the film. 

Another slight inaccuracy is to do with the funeral rites of Hector, as depicted in the film where Priam meets with Achilles in private and pleads with him to give Hector's body back to him, so he can be given a proper funeral, which Achilles does agree to (which is part of Homer's Iliad). However, the film depicts the funeral games lasting 12 days but in the texts it only lasts 9 days with Hector being buried on the 10th day. 

There are even more inaccuracies but the last one I will mention is to do with the fate of Paris, Hector's brother, who is shown to survive the sacking of Troy and after he kills Achilles with his arrows, including an arrow through his heel (hence the term Achilles heel). However (again!) in the Iliad, Paris actually dies during the war instead of surviving as he was killed by a poison arrow fired by legendary Greek archer, Philoctetes. 

So, that's it for the inaccuracies (well at least here anyway!).

SUM UP

So, to sum up, Troy remains a very solid and entertaining historical epic war film, which features some solid performances, particularly from Brad Pitt, Eric Bana and Brian Cox as well as excellently staged battle scenes. The film is somewhat of course inaccurate in its faithfulness to Homer's Iliad and there is even very little text taken from the poem itself as well some daft plot moments. 

However all that aside, this is definitely a very underrated war film, which is well worth checking out despite its average score of 53% on Rotten Tomatoes (a site which I never put much stock into anyway!). So, with that said, I will rate Troy:

8 out of 10

So, that's it for now and I will be back soon with another post before Christmas.

So, until then its bye for now! 

GTA San Andreas 20th Anniversary Review (Revisited)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well, since its the 20th anniversary of the classic action game, GTA San Andreas, I figured I would re-do my previous review of the original game a bit for this occassion. I will also incorporate in some aspects of the definitive edition remaster of the game, which was a disaster on release in 2021 but has since been patched well enough.

So, with that said let's take another look at this GTA classic and see how it fairs 20 years later...

And here is the usual warning: 

PLOT SPOILERS ARE AHEAD!!!

STORY 

So, it all begins in Los Santos (based on Los Angeles) back in 1992, when Carl "CJ" Johnson (voiced by hip-hop artist Young Maylay) returns back to his home to attend his mother's funeral.  CJ goes back home to his neighbourhood where he meets up with his brother, Sweet (Faizon Love), and his gangster friends Ryder (MC Eiht) and Big Smoke (Clifton Powell).  Together they go about trying to re-establish themselves as the main gang in Los Santos, and they also hijack shipments of weapons, and starting turf wars with their main rivals, the Ballas and the Vagos.

CJ is also along the way also forced to help two corrupt police officers, Frank Tenpenny (Samuel L.Jackson) and Eddie Pulaski (Chris Penn) into doing their dirty work for them, who work for the CRASH police program (Community Resources Against Street Hoodlums).  CJ manages however to maintain good relations with his brother and his friends, as well as earning respect in their neighbourhood.  But its not long before things start to turn sour again as CJ receives a tip from Caesar Vialpando (Clifton Collins Jr) who is his sister's boyfriend.

Caesar meets with CJ secretly under a bridge where they spy on Big Smoke and Ryder coming out garage with a green sabre, the car which was seen during the drive-by hit on CJ's mother.  CJ realises then that Sweet, who is going on a gang mission, that he is walking into a trap set up by Tenpenny.  CJ arrives too late on the scene to prevent the ambush, and Sweet is injured by a gunshot, and after making a last stand, the police arrive and CJ is arrested, and taken out into the San Andreas countryside by Tenpenny.

Tenpenny wants CJ to assassinate a witness who is a threat to him and his partner Eddie, and with little choice CJ does the hit.  CJ soon after is also called up by a stranger called the Truth (Peter Fonda) who was recruited by Tenpenny as well to prepare in discrediting a district attorney.  The Truth is an old hippie and marijuana farmer, who naturally pretty spaced out, and sends CJ to do different missions.  CJ also is set up to meet one of Caesar's cousins, the crazed Catalina (Cynthia Farrell) who he does some robberies with, and also engages in some rather kinky sex (we hear it rather than see it!).

CJ through Caesar also hears about some underground street races out in the country, and he ends up racing against Catalina, and after winning the race, she hands over the deeds to a garage she owns in San Fierro (the equivalent of San Francisco).  CJ along with Caesar, and his sister Kendl (voiced by rapper Yo-Yo) and the Truth all travel out to San Fierro, however they find the garage to be empty and deserted, which angers CJ.  Kendl manages to persuade CJ to turn it into a business, and he ends up recruiting a couple of mechanics and an electronics whiz named Zero (David Cross) in order to do so.  As the business starts to turn a profit, CJ also befriends a Triad leader, the blind Wu Zi Mu "Woozie" (James Yaegashi) and does some business with him as well.

Eventually CJ also travels out to Las Venturas (based on Las Vegas) where he meets up with some more business associates.  Along the way however he is intercepted by a secret government agent by the name of Mike Toreno (James Woods) who asks him to do some work for him, and in return he will secure Sweet's release.  And to cut a long story short, its not long before CJ eventually makes his way back to Los Santos, where things have gone from bad to worse, where Big Smoke rules the roost and has filled the city with drug addled gangsters and its to CJ to put an end to it once and for all.   

THOUGHTS  

There is no doubt that GTA San Andreas is a superb game and its ambitious scale alone makes it a very worthy gaming experience.  The transition to not only a new city, but a new state also expands on the game's appeal considerably, as now the main character can travel from place to place over a vast area and three different cities. And its the game's scale, characters, combat and overall fun experience that makes it one of the greatest GTA games and indeed one of the modern greats in gaming. 

GAMEPLAY

The gameplay mechanics have also improved quite a bit as well, as now with the main character, CJ, he can also sorts of things such as learn new differet styles of attacks such as boxing, martial arts as well as dirty street fighting. I will break down the different aspects of the gameplay in paragraphs below further.

GYM TRAINING 

CJ can also do something about his physical appearance as he can work out at the gym, and either build up his body by lifting weights, or build up stamina and endurance on an exercise bike or a treadmill, and he can even put on weight by eating too much!  Apparently there was even a rumour going around that CJ could eat too much and become so overweight that he would eventually keel over and die, but I tried stuffing CJ full of food for ages and it never happened! However every time CJ overeats, he will throw up and lose a bit of his health bar so he could die that way right enough!

MOVEMENT AND CHARACTER STATS

Unlike the previous main characters such as Claude and Tommy (in GTA III and Vice City respectively) CJ now has the ability to swim and climb over fences, as well as to crouch while moving. CJ can also even get a new haircut as well as get tatoos, and in addition to the pre-determined outfits you get from Vice City, here CJ can go into cloth stores and chose his own gear, which can also add to his sex appeal (which is shown as bar meter along with his other aspects such as muscle, stamina, fat and weapon skill).

DATING 

CJ can also go out on dates with girls and there is of course a progress metre for that as well, and CJ can pick up different girlfriends in the different locations in the game, all of whom have different tastes for food, bars, events etc.  And if the date goes well then some idyllic, romantic music is played but if it goes badly then rather amusingly we used to hear "Killing in the name of" by Rage Against The Machine play over the cutscene! However since the original release, RATM's track no longer features on the soundtrack, so its just the usual romantic theme instead.      

MISSIONS 

Again there is a huge variety of missions here as well, with CJ having more than just the option of playing the story missions (which are really varied as it is) but he can also play minigames such as burgalries, go on trucking missions, take lessons at an advanced driving school, get involved in street races, and also playing pool, arcade games and basketball. Further to this in the Xbox 360 version of the game, the missions will also feature checkpoints, which is very welcome and more recently in the definitive edtion remaster, it also features checkpoints as well as an autosave feature after completing a mission.

GANG WARS AND TURFS 

Another key factor in the game is also the gang wars, where CJ will have to take over different turfs in the city, owned by other gangs such as the Ballas, which is done by killing a few gang members, which sparks a gang war, after which CJ must survive a wave of attacks from the gangs, after which he takes over the turf.  This plays a crucial part later on in the game when CJ returns to Los Santos as he must take over at least 35% of the gang turfs in Los Santos in order to activate the final story mission (called The End of the Line).

VEHICLES 

In addition to this, there are also a large variety of vehicles to use, as in addition to the usual cars, there are bicycles, a combine harvester, a trailer, street sweeper being some of the more novelty type modes of transportation.  There is also the inclusion of planes and helicopters as there is a variety of these two, although CJ's necessity to learn to fly prompts one of the game's most frustrating missions, which I will say a bit more about later.

VOICE ACTING AND MUSIC (Warning: this section contains strong language and spoilers!)

As for the voice acting, again things are top notch with a great cast. 

Starting with real life hip-hop artist, Young Maylay putting in an excellent performance as the central character, Carl "CJ Jonhson, who returns to Los Santos after five years and makes a name for himself again.  CJ is a pretty likeable character despite all his crimes, most of them are done out of either survival, necessity or being purely manipulated, but as a character he nevers get ahead of himself, and he carries that way till the end. Young Maylay, or to use his real name, Chris Bellard, did not get on well with Rockstar as he had a fallout with them after the game released and claimed he would never work for them again afteward.

Maylay also get's some great lines throughout the game such as when he is driving and he bumps into someone and he comes out with lines such as "Are you a professional moron, or just a gifted amateur??!" or "Did you steal your licence???!".

Maylay also has some great scripted moments in the game's cutscenes that include the scene where CJ arrives at the empty garage in San Fierro, which Catalina gave him the deeds for.  And when he arrives he angrily shouts about Claude "Mother-fucker! That mute asshole! That fucking snake without a tongue! Gave me this shit-hole instead of a pink slip? I must be the biggest fucking idiot in the whole fucking world!".  

Then there are the scenes where CJ is out robbing with Catalina and he talks to her of her psychotic behaviour when they are driving and he says to her "You're a great girl and all, but you've gotta calm down!  I know some cold blooded cats that wouldn't act the way you do!".  Or there is the moment where CJ and Catalina rob a bank together and she tells him what to do crowd control and not to take any "shit!" and CJ sarcastically replies "Yes, Miss Catalina, Miss!!".

In another mission cutscene, Maylay has a good dramatic moment where CJ sits in deep thought, feeling guilty (SPOILER!!) over killing his former "homie" Ryder.  And as Caesar arrives to congratulate CJ on taking down Ryder and his drug syndicate saying that people think he is a hero, and CJ somberly says to him "Shit's still fucked up. Man, I got homies I used to run with that turn their back on me, over this".  And CJ continues, lamenting over Ryder "Fucking Ryder man! That was my homie! And I've killed him!".  

Another good moment in one of the mission's "Vertical Bird" (also one of the most frustrating!) is when CJ steal a jet fighter and uses to bomb some ships in the ocean and Mike Toreno keeps in contact with CJ by radio.  And Toreno says to CJ "You see?? Child's play!" and CJ yells "FUCK YOU, TORENO!!  I NEVER WANNA GO THROUGH THIS AGAIN!! I THINK I'M GONNA HURL!!".  And Toreno teases Carl and CJ shouts at him "Shut up, Toreno!! Where do you want this thing???!" and Toreno fobs him off by saying "I don't know what you're talking about!" and CJ continues to yell at him "TORENO!!".

Samuel L. Jackson as you would expect does a great job as the corrupt copy, Tenpenny, who uses CJ as his own personal puppet and forces him to do his dirty work throughout the game.

Sam naturally of course has some great lines and moments in the story that include the cutscene in the mission "Burning desire" where Tenpenny warns CJ that he owns him.  And Tenpenny says to CJ "Now you get this straight. We own you! You're ours. We can shit on you from such a height you'll think God himself has crapped on you! You understand?!".  

Another good moment from Sam comes in the cutscene for "The Green Sabre" where Tenpenny and his crooked cop partner, Pulaski take CJ out into the middle of the country.  And CJ asks where he is and Tenpenny says to him "The middle-of-fucking-nowhere!  Nice, clean air".  And CJ asks of Sweet (who was badly injured during the events of the mission" and Tenpenny tells him "Sweet is alive. Alive and inside. He's in a prison hospital being treated for gunshot wounds, awaiting trial".  And then Tenpenny warns CJ to say away from Smoke and himself "Now you stay the fuck away from Smoke, and stay the fuck away from us. Otherwise Sweet is going to find himself on a Ballas block getting in touch with his feminine side!". 

Then there is the cutscene from the mission "High Noon" where (SPOILER!!) Tenpenny is about to tie up all his loose ends by finally killing off CJ and his fellow cop, Hernandez, who betrayed him.  And in the scene, Tenpenny angrily hits Hernandez on the back of the head with a spade and yells at him "YOU SNITCH PIECE OF SHIT! YOU VATO ASSHOLE! YOU SOLD US OUT!".  And Tenpenny get's into his car and Pulaski asks where he is going and Tenpenny sharply replies "To get drunk and get laid - you got a problem with that?!!" and Pulaski says no and then Tenpenny says "Good. I'll see you back at the precinct" and he looks to CJ and says "And I'll see YOU in the next life, Carl!".   

 

And last of all is the cutscene from the final mission "The End of the Line" where (BIG SPOILER!) CJ kills Big Smoke, Tenpenny shows up with a shotgun and tells CJ of his plan to flee the city. So, in the scene Tenpenny says to CJ "Carl Johnson my man! First you killed Pulaski then this fat fuck?! There's no stopping you!". 

 

Tenpenny then has CJ fill up a suitcase with some of Smoke's drug money and CJ asks "How does it feel being all alone? Nobody got your back?" and Tenpenny says "What makes you think I'm alone? I've got two rookies out there, but I gotta open their eyes slowly, a little truth here, a little there...". Then Tenpenny says to CJ "I'm not about to get killed by some angry mob" and CJ asks "You getting a plane out of here?" and Tenpenny says "Ding ding ding ding! Good answer, Carl! You know you're gonna thank me one day for opening your eyes. Oh, I almost forgot Carl..." and he cocks his shotgun and says "...its time to die!". CJ then tries to distract Tenpenny by pretending Sweet is behind them and he ducks for cover as Tenpenny shoots at him but misses and grabs the suitcase and backs out and says "It ain't, Carl! It ain't over!".  

Faizon Love as Sweet, CJ's brother, is also excellent, and he stands as just about one of the only old school gangsters around, as he is sickened by all the drugs that festers his neighbourhood.

Faizon has some good moments aswell although his performance is mostly quite serious and dramatic he does have some amusing scenes aswell.

And to save time and making this post much bigger than it needs to be (than it already is!) I will mention one scene from the mission "Riot" where Sweet having met the wank obssessed English musician, Maccer (voiced by Shaun Ryder of The Happy Mondays) asks who he is.

So Sweet asks "What's with the weird Brit?" and CJ tells Sweet "What? Oh, Maccer! He got a little problem he can't control".  And Sweet asks "What kind of problem?" and CJ awkwardly says "He can't stop, you know, giving himself a little bit".  And Sweet says "What, you mean he likes to consult Professor Hans Jerkov?" and CJ says "Yeah regularly!" and Sweet says a few more crude phrases for masturbation such as "Spank the money" and "Take Palm-ela out??" and "Burp the worm??".   

 

I will however add one more scene involving Faizon, which is from the earlier mission "Home coming" where CJ picks up Sweet from outside the courthouse having been freed from jail. So, Sweet annoyed by CJ's attitude and boasting about his new success out in San Fierro and Las Venturas, asks him "Nigga, what the fuck is this bullshit?! Take me home!". So, as they return to Grove Street, its filled with baseheads and Ballas, and one of them comes up to them with a blender "Anyone want this blender? It sort of works!" and Sweet shouts "That's mum's blender!". CJ however resignedly looks at the area and says "Looks like baseheads taken over the spot, come on let's go home" but Sweet angrily says "This IS home! Get those fuckers out of mom's house! You were BORN in there! DAMN!". 

 

So, after CJ helps Sweet take out the drug dealers and Ballas in the Grove, CJ says to Sweet "Right let's get out of here and go and see Kendl" however Sweet firmly tells CJ "Kendl can come and see me at her home RIGHT HERE!". CJ however says "But there ain't nothing here anymore dude" and Sweet says defiantly "Rome wasn't built in a day, nigga!" and walks off leaving CJ to say to himself "My brother can be a real pain in the ass!".  

Clifton Powell is also very good as Big Smoke, as his gruff voice adds well to the character, as Smoke gives off the idea that he is an old school gangster, who is not into pushing drugs, but instead he reveals himself to be just that, as he takes over the gangs in the middle of the game.

Powell also has some good moments in the script such as during the mission "Just Business" where CJ and Big Smoke flee from a group of Russian mobsters on a bike.  And during the chase a car chasing them hits a bus and Smoke laughs out loud saying "I'll never dis public transportation again!".  And then later on Big Smoke shouts to Carl re: his objections "Man, stop being so negative! Focus on the good news!" and Carl says "Such as?!" and Smoke shouts "We ain't dead, and your trigger finger still works, fool! I think the gearbox is screwed up on this thing! I can't get no speed!".  And Carl says to him "Yeah, who negative now bitch?!" and Smoke says to him "Point taken.  I'll keep my mouth shut from now on!".  

 

BIG SPOILER AHEAD!!

 

And last of all is the scene where Big Smoke is confronted by CJ as the two of them have trade bullets and before that, CJ enters to find Smoke playing a video game. So, CJ says to Smoke as he enters "Hey, Smoke!" and without turning around Smoke says, somewhat stoned "Heyyyy CJ". CJ then asks "How did you know it was me?" and Smoke says "I knew it would always be my old running dog CJ. I knew you was coming and I don't give a shit!". Smoke then takes a hit on his bong and CJ then says "Well, I'm gonna take care of your fat ass and your friends in the police department". Smoke then defiantly shouts "Fuck Tenpenny and fuck his Polish lapdog! Fuck the police!".  CJ then asks Smoke "What happened to you, man?!" and Smoke shouts "I'M A FUCKIN CELEBRITY, MAN! I'VE MADE IT, CJ! I CAN'T BE TOUCHED!". Smoke then says to CJ "Man, what the fuck do you care? Ah fuck it! Guess we might as well do this shit then!" and he grabs his gun.

 

So, in the following scene, when Big Smoke is fatally wounded by CJ, lies on the floor dying and coughing, CJ asks "Smoke, what made you flip out like that, man?" and Smoke coughing says "I got caught up in the money, the power!". CJ then asks "But why? We were homies for life!" and Smoke says "I had no choice, I had to do it, when I saw the opportunity and when I'm gone, everyone's gonna remember my name, BIG SMOKE!" and he then gasps and dies. 

Clifton Collins Jr does well also in his role as Cesar Vialpando, although it has to be said that his semi raspy voice does get annoying after a while and when he says "Hey, Holmes!" he sounds like he is constipated!

Clifton also has some moments such as the scene where Cesar takes his girlfriend and Carl's sister, Kendall out to the country to keep her safe from the city.  And in the cutscene Cesar angrily says to CJ "This ain't over, man. I did this to take care of my woman. But now I'm gonna head straight back home, and I'm gonna cap me some fucking dope dealers!".  And CJ warns Cesar not to go back or he could get himself killed but Cesar impatiently says "We already know who the fucking bad guys are, man, your stinking Grove Street brother Smoke, and those chota pigs Tenpenny and Pulaski!".  

Lastly there is the cutscene in the mission "Los Desparados" where Cesar awkwardly asks CJ his permission to ask Kendall "the question" i.e. to propose to her.  And in the scene Cesar says to CJ "While we here, I, eerr, I have a question to ask you" and CJ says "Yeah what?" and Cesar says "Well its....its personal" and CJ reassures him he can ask him anything he wants.  So Cesar says to CJ "OK, here goes. I want to ask Kendl the question" but CJ doesn't follow his meaning, so Cesar says again "No, holmes.  The QUESTION!" and CJ get's what he means and says he's fine with it.   

James Woods, who is generally great in anything he does, and he certainly is here as the secret government agent Mike Toreno, who manipulates CJ into doing work for him.

Woods has plenty of good moments in the story although I will only mention a few to save some time such as the one where Toreno finally reveals who he really is after putting him through some racing exercises.  And Toreno warns CJ "Do not be a fucking smart-ass with me!  I work for a government agency. It is not important which one. I will try not to confuse you. Yes, when we last met, I was involved in battling threats in Latin America, by any means necessary! That does not make me a drug dealer. Now, the money that we raised, the friends that we won over, have helped us immeasurably in our overseas interests".  

Woods has one of my favourite exchanges of dialogue in the game with CJ, as Toreno grabs CJ from behind by the throat and tells him "Got you again, Carl!  You're half asleep!  I could have killed you in 9 different ways.  Wake up and smell the coffee!".  And he let's CJ go who angrily says to Toreno "You need to lay off the coffee!".

And later there is also the scene in the mission "Vertical Bird" where CJ steals a jet fighter at Toreno's behest and after CJ bombs some ships in the ocean Toreno communicates with him over a radio.  And Toreno says to CJ "You see!  Child's play!" which enrages CJ who shouts at him "FUCK YOU, TORENO!  I NEVER WANT TO GO THROUGH THIS AGAIN!  I THINK I'M GONNA HURL!".  And after this Toreno teases CJ saying "Ooh, what a big whiner, you want some cheese with that wine? Hey, you were spectacular. You know what, I'm beginning to think my little Carl is a double agent. Oooh!".  And CJ shouts at him "Shut up, Toreno!!  Where do you want this thing?!" and Toreno says to him "What thing? I don't know what you're talking about - you stole it. Got nothing to do with me, I don't know what you're talking about. See ya 'round!".  

Peter Fonda is also very good as the aged hippie, the Truth, who is pretty spaced throughout the whole game, and he also makes some weird prophecies too, and at one point gets CJ to steal an advanced jetpack from a military airbase, which is one of the game's most enjoyable missions "Black Project".

Fonda also has some good lines of dialogue such as in his first exchange with CJ over the phone as he says to him "Carl..." and CJ asks "Who's this?" and Truth says "Its me.  The Truth" and CJ asks "Who?" and Truth says "Perfection!  They said you were a moron!".

Another example later comes in the mission "Wear flowers in your hair" which is set in San Fierro, CJ and Truth drive around to recruit guys to help build-up CJ's garage business.  And during the mission, Truth spouts out some weird conspiracy theories to CJ " Now what if I told you, we never went to the moon, JFK lives in Scotland with Janis Joplin and the only reason we've been in a Cold war for the last 45 years was because snake-headed aliens run the oil business??".  And CJ sarcastically replies "I think you popped another microdot!" and Truth says "Good!  Keep it that way".  

James Yaegashi is also excellent as Wu Zi Mu or "Woozie" as he is known to everyone else who is a mild mannered guy who just so happens to be the leader of a group of Triads, the Mountain Cloud Boys.  Woozie is blind but he doesn't like it to be mentioned in his presence but despite this he has highly attuned senses and he can still do things such as beat CJ at playing video games but most of the time his men let him win at games.

And in one of the cutscenes this is noted when CJ and Woozie are playing blackjack and CJ checks Woozie's hand, which is a losing one and Woozie annoyed says " Damn. You're bad luck for me. You know, when I play the other guys, I always win!".  But in another cutscene as Woozie does some putting in his office, one of his associates moves a glass into its path so he can hole it but the associate moves the glass away when CJ tries to putt.  And CJ looks on incredulously and says "What the....?!" and Woozie sensing CJ missed says "Aww bad luck!".   

Yaegashi also has some good lines too in the story that include the scene where in the mission "Mountain cloud boys" CJ and Woozie are ambushed by a Vietnamese gang who kill one of Woozie's Triad clan.  And in the scene Woozie shows another side to his personality as he becomes furious at the deaths of his clan and yells at the gang "THE TRIADS MUST HAVE VENGEANCE!!  YOUR MOTHERS WERE SLUTS!!!".  And after they kill off the rival gang members, Woozie says to CJ "Thank you, Carl, you saved me from having to kill them all myself!".

MC Eiht is also pretty good as Ryder, one of the Grove street gang that (SPOILER!!) ends up betraying CJ and Sweet and is part of the Loco syndicate.  Eiht has some good moments too and Ryder's character always seems to enjoy putting CJ down about his driving and he also spends quite a bit of his time high on marijuana.

And Eiht's good scenes include the one where CJ pays Ryder visit when Ryder is high as a kite on marijuana.  And Ryder, stoned, says to CJ " Hey, CJ, tell me why I didn't finish high school" and CJ offers a few joky explanations and Ryder laughs and says "It's cause I'm too intelligent for this shit. I am the real deal fool, oh, yeah. A genius!".

And in another scene during a mission when Ryder slags off CJ for his driving as they get and drive off, Ryder says to CJ "You drive, CJ - seein as you "Mister Driver" an all and CJ says "Aw not your shit again, don't give me a hard time about my driving, I ain't got the energy fot it!".  And Ryder says to him "Well don't roll the damn car over and blow us all up in flames then!" and CJ says "Aw, I ain't risin to your shit, man!" and Ryder says "Good! Means you'll concentrate on the road then!".  So CJ says "You love givin a homie a hard time" and Ryder says "Just tryin to keep my soldiers alive, nigga!" and CJ says "By naggin them to death???" and Ryder shouts "Watch the road, motherfucker!  Watch the road!".

Other notable voice actors include Chris Penn, the late brother of Sean Penn, who gives a fine performance as the corrupt cop, Eddie Pulaski, who is keen to just get rid of CJ as fast as possible despite Tenpenny insisting on using him. 

So, I will mention just one mission of Pulaski's, which is the final one he appears in "High Noon" where CJ is forced to chase down and kill Pulaski as he flees the scene where CJ and Officer Hernandez were both to be buried. 

So, in the mission, CJ chases Pulaski and as they drive on the road, CJ shouts out to Pulaski "Hey Eddie, you know Tenpenny gonna rub you out too!" and Pulaski shouts "Carl, you got it all wrong, pal! Tenpenny was the one saving your ass! Every time I wanted to get rid of you, he found some excuse to keep you around! How's sister?! You know I always had a thing for her! Me and my friends got some picture of her and her Barrio boyfriend going at it like a pair of horny chiwawas! Best stakeout I ever done!". CJ then warns Pulaski "I know what you're trying to do, so don't get into my head!" and Pulaski then provokes Carl further "Carl, you shoud have seen your mum's body, she was a real mess!" and CJ warns him "Don't talk about my moms!" and Pulaski taunts him "Most of her face was hanging off! The boys were touching, joking around and shit!" and CJ finally snaps and shouts "FUCK YOU, PULASKI! FUCK YOU!!".  

So, after CJ manages to shoot Eddie, in the final cutscene CJ stands over Eddie who is dying, CJ asks him "Any last requests?" and Eddie says "Yeah, can I fuck your sister??".  And this prompts CJ to say, disgusted by Pulaski "You're an asshole to the end.  Punk motherfucker!" and he finishes him off.

Jas Anderson is also quite funny as the annoying, talentless rapper and wannabe gangster, OG Loc who at one get's Carl help to get his rap career on the go by discrediting a popular rapper named Mad Dogg (played by the rapper Ice-T).

Loc has some funny scenes that involve things such as getting revenge over a former hispanic cellmate, who is pretty camp and says that OG "dropped the soap" when he was in prison.  And later after they kill off the cellmate, CJ drops Loc off at his new job, which is working at a burger joint as a "hygiene technician" and how it is "just a stepping stone to greatness!" as Loc plans long term to become a famous rapper.  So when CJ drops Loc at the joint, CJ says to Loc "I'll see you around" and Loc says to him "Like a quarter pound!  Later!".

However Jas's funniest moment as Loc comes when Loc quits his job at the burger place and he turns back and shouts at them from the door "Man, fuck you! And I don't care what you heard, I ain't nobody's ass technician, BITCH!".

Next up we have Danny Dyer who makes another welcome appearance as Kent Paul, the British record producer who get's lost in the desert out in Las Venturas.

And Dyer has some funny bits of dialogue in the game such as when Kent and Maccer are both rescued by CJ in the desert as they are both feeling worse for wear after taking some peyote. So as CJ finds them out in the desert, Maccer complains "I can't feel me legs, our P! I've wanked the use out of em!" so Paul with disgust says "Just stand up, you soppy cunt! We go through this every weekend!". And as CJ picks them up and they are chased by rednecks in a truck from a snake farm, Maccer says to Paul "This is a very stressful situation!" and Paul shouts "You're fucking tell me it is??!!". 

And Shaun Ryder also makes a brief cameo as the perverted musician, Maccer, who can't resist giving himself a bit of "hand comfort" infront of other people!

And Shaun does have some prettu crude lines of dialogue that include the one where he mistakenly asks if Rosie (Rosenberg the lawyer that appeared in Vice City) has great tits. So, Maccer asks Paul "What kind of tits did this Rosie have? Small tits? Big tits? Or tits like a beanie or a saddlebag?!" and Paul exasperated shouts "Rosie's a man!!". Maccer then continues to tease Paul by saying "You look a pale as a drowned baby, man!" and Paul groans and Maccer says "P, what you need is some food down ya!" and Paul groans "I think I'm gonna chuck!" and then Maccer says "A fried egg with mayonaise will sort it" and then "What about a pickled egg?" and Paul has had enough and says "Pull over NOW!" and he get's out the car and vomits if you let CJ pull over.

Later on of course during a recording session with Madd Dogg, Maccer is at it again as he chugs off in the booth much to the disgust of the others. So, Paul tries to dissuade Maccer from wanking again by saying to him think of Maggie Thatcher, which doesn't even work! So, in the scene as Maccer is doing it he shouts "I'M LOVE YOU, MAGGIE!! I LOVE YOU, MAGGIE!". Oh God! (sick bags at the ready!). 

Cynthia Farrell also makes a great return as the psychotic Catalina (who was one of the main baddies from GTA III) and she get's some of the funniest lines of dialogue and delivers them with in style.

As for a few examples there is a line when they rob a bank and Catalina shouts at the staff "Hand over the cash or I'll blow your fucking face off!! Leave the panic button, or I'll kill your children too!".  And as the clerk sets off the alarm, Catalina shoots the clerk and yells "I warned you, you stupid bitch!  Stupid fucking bitch!  EAT MY SHIT!!!".

In one of the other missions "Gone Courting" Carl arrives at Catalina's hideout and calls on her and we hear her say "In here, mi amor" and he says "Ai'ght come on, let's go!" and she says angrily "You get your sorry ass in here, Carl Jonhson, or I will shove a fucking hand grenade up it!!".

Another example is when they drive to commit another robbery, Carl asks Catalina "What's wrong?" and Catalina says "Nothing.  I just hate men!" and Carl says to her "Well give me a break!" and Catalina says to him "Here's your break, you being at my barbacue and not being eaten!" and CJ says "Well that's one way of looking at shit I suppose!".

Cataline also taunts CJ about his manhood and his ability (or lack of it) to sexually please her throughout their missions, which prompts more putdowns such as "Tiny balled idiota!" and my favourite "You are a waste of good balls!".  And after they split up she seems to have a hard time dealing with it and she keeps calling him over and over!

Charlie Murphy (the older brother of Eddie Murphy) is also pretty good as the pimp, Jizzy, who CJ briefly works for but is really spying on him to find out about the Loco syndicate.  Murphy also get's some good lines as Jizzy such as in the mission "Mike Toreno" where Jizzy tries to calm down a hotheaded T-Bone Mendez by saying "T-Bone! Pump your brakes, baby. Take a chill pill, and just lay back and let the red mist fall, brother!".

And lastly there is the mission "Outrider" where Jizzy calls CJ to meet up with T-Bone and says to him "Well, my business associates, they need a little assistance. And I thought of you, friend. Meet T-Bone at the gas station next to the docks at Easter Basin. He's waiting for you in a 4-door sedan. Excuse me, partner, I got a call coming in. Arrivederci!".

Kid Frost is also good in his role as the hotheaded drug dealing associate with the Loco syndicate, T-Bone Mendez.

Frost's best moment comes in the mission "Outrider" when CJ is set to meet with T-Bone in a Sedan car but CJ can't see him anywhere so he get's into the car only to find T-Bone spring up behind in the backseat and he holds CJ at gunpoint.  So at gunpoint T-Bone threatens Carl saying " Hey, you a pinche jura or what?! You think you can mess with me?!! I will blow your head off, and rape and kill your family, you snake!! You think you can fucking bullshit me, and fuck me over?! I know your fucking game, ese!".  T-Bone then grills CJ further and yells "Who you working for?!" and CJ struggles and says "NOBODY!" and T-Bone let's him go and says "I almost had you, man. I almost fucking had you. Guacha! You gotta be careful in this business, man, you know that".    

William Fichtner who reprises his role as the neurotic drug addled lawyer, Ken Rosenberg, who was Tommy Vercetti's business partner in GTA: Vice City and he does a fine job here again.

And to quote one of Fichtner's good scenes, there is one in the mission, "The Meat Business" where Paul gives Rosenberg a few lines of cocaine to get him fired up again. So, after Rosenberg snorts a line, he shouts excitedly "Oh, ha ha ha ha! Baby, I'm back, I AM BACK! Let's get this show on the road!". So, Carl asks Rosenberg "So everything is ok now?" but Rosenberg says "No! Absolutely not! I'm still screwed! Absolutely screwed, but at least now I'm in the right frame of mind. What the fuck are we going to do? Any minute now, some Mafia bullet is going to splatter my brains all over the wall! My wall, my beautiful wall...".

So as CJ and Rosenberg drive to a meeting with the Mafia at the meat factory, Rosenberg expresses his desire to lead an ordinary life. So, Rosenberg tells CJ "I want to do something safe and legal and boring, with people that like me. And have a wife and some kids and get divorced and fight for weekend access, like everybody else!". So, CJ tells Rosenberg "OK, I'll see what I can do" and Rosenberg says while snorting coke "Thanks, I'm just so tired of all this life or death bullshit. (sniff) Oh, shit, shit's all down my (sniff) damned shirt, and everything. Oh, that's my best shirt too, doesn't this shirt look good on me?!". 

And last but far from least is Frank Vincent (who sadly passed away last year) who is great as the mob boss, Salvatore Leone and he is very much at home playing mob guys so he does a fine job here again in that role.

And Frank has some good lines of dialogue but his most notable ones come not long after CJ has robbed Leone's casino and a furious Leone calls up CJ and threatens to kill him. So, Leone yells at CJ "You two-faced backstabbing piece of eggplant shit!" and CJ sarcastically says "Mr Leone, nice to hear from you too". Leone then furiously yells "You're dead! I'm gonna fuck you up, your brother and sister! You're whole family!!! You're ALL dead!!". CJ however is not worried and casually says to Leone "I'm sorry, Mr Leone but I've got some money to spend on some expensive trash!".    

SOUNDTRACK AND RADIO STATIONS 

As for the game's soundtrack, well while it isn't as strong as Vice City's diverse soundtrack there are still plenty of great tracks to chose from here, and there is a big variety to chose from, and different genres such as rock, funk, rap, pop, metal, raggae and country.

And some of my favourite tracks appear from the radio stations Radio X, in which they play alternative rock from the early 90s, including tracks from bands such as Helmet (again GTA introduce me to them, still one of my favourite bands!) "Unsung", Jane's addiction "Been caught stealing" , Depeche Mode "Personal Jesus", Faith no more "Midlife crisis", Rage against the machine "Killing in the name of", Ozzy Osbourne "Hellraiser" and Soundgarden "Rusty cage".

Some of the rap tracks, which are naturally befitting of the period setting, are pretty good such as on Playback FM, which is hosted by none other than Chuck D of Public Enemy, who even plays a PE track "Rebel without a pause", as well as other tracks such as Kool G Rap & DJ Polo's "Road to the Riches" and Ultramagnetic MCs "Critical beatdown".

K-DST, which plays some classic rock is also a really good channel as you get a choice of songs from bands such as Creedence "Green River", Heart "Baracuda", Kiss "Strutter", Foghat "Slow ride", The Who "Eminence front", Boston "Smokin" and even David Bowie "Somebody up there likes me".  And another pleasant surprise on the radio channels was the K-Rose channel, which has probably one of the catchiest songs of all time on it, which is Jerry Reed's "Amos Moses".  Just class.

On the downside the there is only one radio station for chat radio but there are several radio programs that feature on the station.  It also has to be said that the radio shows themselves are a bit hit and miss but some of them are still funny and they also feature the recurring DJ, Laszlow, who has a funny interview with OG Loc, who get's very angry with Laszlow as they talk at cross purposes. 

Its also worth noting that some of the tracks were removed from the Xbox 360 version of the game such as Rage against the machine's "Killing in the name of" on Radio X, Tom Petty's "Running down a dream" on KT-DST and Utramagnetic MC's "Critical Beatdown" on Playback among others. This is a pity as it would have been good if the full original soundtrack list was kept in this version but I'm guessing it was for copyright reasons.

GRAPHICS 

Moving onto the game's graphics well they are for the most part fairly good but the game does however suffer from having subpar looking character models as the characters look blocky and under-developed in their appearance yet in GTA Vice City the characters models looked a lot better.  However I think this might have come down to the fact that the game itself is so big and has such expansive environments that the quality of the character modelling had to suffer.

However despite this, the game's graphics are still quite impressive when it comes to its environments, which look good and are pretty varied given the game is set in three cities, it covers a lot of ground indeed.  The game also makes good graphical use of its HUD (heads up display) for CJ's health bar as well as the stats for his stamina, muscle, sex appeal, body fat etc which in itself is a unique feature in the game.  Its also worth noting the game's environmental effects are also pretty good as it makes good use of its colours for sunsets in the evening or even the rain and storm effects are well done.  

However as the Definitive Edition remaster released in 2021, this sees San Andreas get a massive visual overhaul and for the most part it looks very impressive. There of course some issues with the graphics still with some clipping issues and minor glitches as well as some of the character model choices (e.g. Carl's Grove Street girlfriend, Denise, still looks a bit weird!). However all that aside, the remaster definitely remains the best looking version of the game and it also recently got a nice update where you can use the classic lighting from the game, which really does add a nice touch and a neat throwback to the original. 

FLAWS 

As for GTA: San Andreas's flaws....well yeah despite it being a great game there are still a fair few to be found.

So for starters, I felt that the countryside missions can take an inordinate amount of time for CJ to get to his eventual destination especially when he travels to meet with Catalina, he has alot of ground to cover from his original save point.  One of the ways around this is of course to buy one of the properties as a halfway house between missions, but that depends on how much money you have. This however is partly mitigated by the emastered version's automatic checkpoint saves after finishing a mission.

Another slight issue with the gameplay is to do with the game's targeting system for weapons and you can find at times that CJ occasionally gets stuck or faces the wrong way when he auto-aims his gun at a target, which means you need to target them again.  This to be fair however isn't a big deal but it is still slight a slight annoyance that is worth mentioning. 

Another frustrating aspect early on in the game is the lack of money, especially in Los Santos where CJ has to make his way up again in the hood, and for all the missions he does with his homies, they don't even give him much if any money, especially Ryder, who is a real tight-ass!  Its not until the turf wars start to rear their ugly heads, that is when the drug dealers pop up on a every street corner, then you can make money by shooting them as they leave behind $2000 each time.  And its only really when CJ leaves Los Santos, when he meets up with his new associates that he finally starts to make money.

Another annoyance in the game is as I mentioned earlier on, the mission where CJ has to learn to fly, on the orders of Mike Toreno, and you have to undergo some training missions on how to take off and lane a plane, fly it through the sky, parachute from it successfully and most frustrating of all, do a bloody barrel roll, which NEVER comes in handy during the actual gameplay!

So, this brings up one of the game's most infuriating missions, "Vertical Bird" where Mike Toreno puts CJ on a mission which involves flying a harrier jet, and it is a nightmare to control the jet, and more often that it is far too easy to crash the jet into the water!  This level itself is often cited by gamers as one of the most difficult in the series. However on repeated playing, this mission isn't too bad to be fair once you get used to it.

And for me one of the most frustrating and annoying missions in the whole game deserves its place here, which is "Interdiction" where CJ has to do some dirty work for Toreno as he is to protect a chopper carrying cargo from enemy choppers that circle it.  And in the mission CJ needs to shoot them down with a rocket launcher but the cargo chopper can too often get caught in the crossfire which makes this goddamn mission a massive pain in the ass and I've lost count the amount of times I've had to redo over the years!!  And by the time I'm done with it I'm ready to punch Toreno myself never mind how CJ must have felt!

Ahhh but wait for it (and I apologise for this next bit).......there is another mission, which makes "Interdiction" and "Vertical Bird" appear like a picnic and THAT mission is "Cop Wheels".  Now to say I hate this mission would be a total understatement but that simply does not do justice as to just how infuriating it is! Its just a maddening pile of crap!

Words fail me on how annoying this one is and the premise is fairly simple enough, CJ has to steal four cop motorbikes in prep for their robbery on the mafia casino and get them transported onto a car packer on the very busy freeways of Las Venturas.  Now this might sound relatively straight forward but believe me it isn't and you only have 12 minutes to get all four bikes onto the packer or you fail the mission.  Why ONLY 12 MINUTES???!!  I mean why don't they allow for a full 15???!!  I mean that would help to give you a bit more time to get things done!

And not only that but your problems in the mission are compounded by the large distance between each of the bikes and also the big distance between you and the packer on the freeway, which is miles away.  Combine this with the police always on your ass for stealing the bikes and also carelessly but unavoidably crashing into cars or lamp posts or walls, it eats into your time too much and before you know it you are out of time, well either that or got arrested!

I'm sure there are other missions beyond this one that will also cause some major frustration (Vertical Bird for sure) but none as worse as this.  Cop Wheels is one of the worst missions in the game for sure and if you have any sanity left and enough patience you might just get through it! 

OK rant over!

Another problem I have with the game is how you cannot gain access to the Ammu-nation stores from the start of the game, as you can only get a crappy 9mm gun from the old guy, Emmett until a specific mission later on in the first Los Santos part of the game. This is a pain as you think it would be better if CJ could just go to the gun store and make his life a bit easier rather than rely on the most basic handgun in the game! You can of course kill other enemies such as the Ballas or other gangs to get slightly better weapons such as Tec-9's or shotguns but that's about it.

Then we have a similar issue with the clothes stores as you need to wait quite a few missions before you get a call from Cesar, who tells CJ that he needs to get himself some gang colour clothes. Now, its funny he says that because you cannot get the Grove Street outfit from ANY of the stores in the game! I mean you can get some similar green clothed items, such as the green hoody from the Binco store but you simply cannot get the actual gang outfit anywhere, which is a bit daft if you ask me but hey ho.  

As for some plot niggles I felt that some of the Truth's missions were a bit pointless and left things unexplained such as the missions "Black Project" and "Green Goo" where in the first one, Truth has CJ steal a jet pack to later use it to capture some green goo from an US army train.  Now, OK I get the jet pack part at least but its not explained at all why Truth wanted CJ to steal the green goo or what he intended to do with it for that matter either!  So for me this mission is pretty pointless and its basically an excuse for CJ to get his hands on the jet pack later (but don't get me wrong it is one of the cooler gadgets in the game!).

I also felt the same thing about the mission in San Fierro where CJ recruits a couple of mechanics for his garage and during the mission, Truth makes CJ stop and wait for fed cars to go by or wait outside a hospital for some unknown reason. Its the vagueness of the Truth's mission is what makes them a bit annoying at times.  

Also even though Truth in their first call, insults CJ by calling him a "moron" it has to be said the Truth isn't always that bright himself! This is especially true in the missions "Are you going to San Fierro?" where Truth lights up a joint and asks CJ if he wants some but CJ rightfully turns him down because otherwise he might crash the Truth's van! I mean CJ was already feeling the affects of burning Truth's hash fields, so he is not going to feel much better taking a spliff when he has to drive, so, yeah smart move, Truth you knob! 

Last of all, on a personal note, I have to say I really didn't like the racing missions in the game either as they are a real pain in the ass.  I say this because during the racing, its all too easy to crash your car into say a lamp post, which would delay your progress and you will lose your place in the race, either that or spin the car out of control and derail it off a cliff and into the water!   

And for me I think the worst racing mission of the lot is "Farewell my lovely" which is where CJ has to race against Catalina's new lover, Claude (the silent main character from GTA III) and it is far too easy to derail your car off the road in this race, which makes it a major pain in the ass to finish!  So I think its safe to say whenever I play this mission I can't wait to skip it and not only that if you do fail the mission you usually find you have one hell of a long trek back to the starting point again! Again however in the remaster version, this is solved by the use of checkpoints, which is a relief!

In fact further to this its worth mentioning in the mission "Photo opportunity" where CJ and Cesar drive out into the country to spy on the members of the drug syndicate named "Loco" after the mission is over, Cesar suggests they split up and he leaves CJ to make his own way back to San Fierro, which is a LONG way off!!  So that means that CJ has to jack another car simply because Cesar can't be arsed to give his buddy a lift! Ces, you are a dick, mate!     

Also further to this (and this is my last point on Cesar honest!) another REALLY annoying aspect of the game are the constant calls CJ gets from Cesar about pursuing Smoke's couriers that are transporting drugs or "yay" as CJ calls it. These calls feature way too often in the game and if you accidentally or even agree to pursue the couriers, it takes AGES to reach them as they go cross country! Also when this happens you cannot save the game at a safe house if you make the mistake of agreeing but this also happens on the first call you get about the couriers, which makes it unavoidable first time round. So, I would totally recommend to ALWAYS turn down Cesar when he calls about this otherwise you are in for a real pain in the ass of a time to get these guys. 
 
And last of all is an issue with the whole idea of CJ and Woozie robbing a Mafia casino and thinking they would get away with it! I mean its the Mafia after all! And later CJ even gets an angry call from Salvatore Leone, who is furious with CJ and spouts a bunch of death threats at him and how he will kill him and his family and CJ smugly tells Leone that he has a lot of money to spend and has to go. Now, does CJ really believe he will be able to get away with robbing a Mafia owned casino??? I don't think realistically he would have a chance against them and after the end of the game he is bound to get whacked! 

Anyway that's it for the flaws.

SUM UP

So to sum up, in replaying GTA: San Andreas, its still a terrific game overall, as its gameplay is varied and tremendous fun, it also features a superb cast, who all give great performances and again it features a very solid soundtrack with plenty of radio channels and tracks to listen to. It may have some minor flaws and some deeply infuriating missions however for the most part, the bad points are outweighed by its good points and even after all this time it still remains my favourite of the GTA series.

So, I will give GTA San Andreas a rating of:

10 out of 10

So, that's it for now and I will try and be back soon with another posted before Christmas, so until its bye for now!

The Terminator Review "I'll be back!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

So, for this post I've dug well back into the past to redo an old one, so this will be based on my very old review of the sci-fi action classic, The Terminator starring Arnold Schwarzenegger in the lead role as the ruthless killing machine that targets a young woman named Sarah Connor. Also given its now the film's 40th anniversary, its also a perfect time redo this post as well given its been given a brand new 4K release (which I am watching at the time of typing this sentence!).

So, after 40 years, let's see how this action classic fairs...

And the usual warning is coming...

PLOT SPOILERS ARE AHEAD!!  

So, the story is set in Los Angeles in 1984, where at night a strange electric storm takes place and from a blinding white light, the figure of a naked man appears, the Terminator (Schwarzenegger).  The Terminator soon comes by a group of punks, who attack him with flick knives, but the terminator fends them off with ease and kills one of the punks, ripping out his heart, and he takes the clothes from one of the others. Around the same time another electric storm occurs, where we see another naked man materialise, Kyle Reese (Michael Biehn) who quickly evades nearby policeman, by breaking into a closed clothestore, he gives them the slip, and takes a shotgun out of one of the cop cars.  

The next day, a young woman, Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton), who works as a waitress in a local diner, learns on the TV of a murder of a woman with the same name as her, but she brushes it off as a coincidence.  The murder was of course committed by the Terminator, who later on kills another woman of the same name.  With the police deciding to make this information public, Sarah hears this on TV and get's in touch with the police, and when she walks out on the streets, she notices Reese following her, so she goes into a nearby nightclub.  Sarah phones the police on the payphone inside, and speaks to Lt Traxler (Paul Winfield) who tells her to stay put.  

Meanwhile the Terminator locates Sarah's apartment and goes in and kills her flatmate Ginger (Bess Motta) and her boyfriend Matt (Rick Rossovich), and listens to Sarah's voice message who calls from the club.  The Terminator soon tracks Sarah to the nightclub, and before he can shoot her, Reese guns down the Terminator with his shotgun, just in time, as people flee the nightclub, he helps Sarah up and they escape the club, just as the Terminator get's up and chases them, unharmed by the gunshots.  Reese and Sarah drive off with the terminator in pursuit as well as the cops, and after eventually shaking off the police, Reese ditches the car in a parking lot and sneaks into another car.

Reese then explains to Sarah that he is from the future and also that in the future that the world was nearly destroyed by a nuclear war created by the AI military defense machine network Skynet, and out of the ashes rose the machines, who took over the world and put the surviving humans into slave labour.  Reese then tells Sarah that he has been sent back in time to protect her from the terminator, who he reveals is a cyborg assassin, who has been sent to kill her as  her future son John Connor, will become a future resistance leader against the machines.  The terminator soon gives them chase again on the streets, but Sarah and Reese are soon arrested by the cops, who take them both into custody.  

At the police station, Reese is questioned by a criminal psychologist, Dr Silberman (Earl Boen) whom he tells his story to, but naturally Silberman thinks he is delusional.  The terminator soon however arrives, and crashes his car into the station, killing many of the police officers in the station, in searching for Sarah.  Reese however manages to escape custody and rescues Sarah before the terminator can get to her.  

On the road, Sarah and Reese soon stop at a motel, to lay low, however while at the hote, Sarah phones her mother's cabin house, where the Terminator, who has already gotten there, has killed her mother, and pretends to be her on the phone (as the Terminator can mimic anyone's voice) in order to find out where she is.  Reese later on confesses to Sarah that he travelled back in time to meet her because he had always been in love with her since John gave him a picture of her, Sarah touched by this, kisses Reese and they make love.  

Later on the Terminator tracks them down at the motel where they are staying, and Sarah and Reese escape just in time, but the terminator soon chases them again for the final time...

THOUGHTS

The Terminator is without a doubt one of the best sci-fi films of the 1980s, and it stands as one of James Cameron's very best films.  Cameron himself stated that the idea of the terminator came to him in a nightmare he had when he was suffering from a fever, which gave him the image of the metal skeletal figure surrounded by flames.  Cameron also said that he was also influenced by the sci-fi series Outer Limits as well as films such as The Driver, that helped give him the ideas he needed to develop the story.  

The terminator itself remains one of the great villains in modern cinema, as a killing machine, that has no pity, fear, remorse, or any emotion, and is programmed to do just one thing: kill.  The idea of the terminator as a cyborg is also great, and also how tough and resilient the terminator is, as a cyborg it takes on the appearance of a human on the outside, but has a powerful metal endoskeleton underneath, and in the final scenes where we see the terminator emerge from the flaming remains of the big fuel tanker truck, is one of the film's most memorable images. 

PERFORMANCES AND NOTABLE SCENES (Warning: this section may contain spoilers and strong language!)

In terms of the performances in the film well you have to say that Arnold Schwarzenegger is the star of the film, even if he isn't a great actor, his performance as the T-800 series Terminator is sheer perfection, as he plays the ruthless killing machine better than anyone ever could have.  

Arnie himself of course has plenty of great moments in the film such as his first scene where (or second technically) where he walks naked, up to three punks and demands them to give him their clothes. So, in the scene one of the punks (played by Bill Paxton) says "Nice night for a walk, eh?" and Terminator responds "Nice night for a walk" and the 2nd punk asks "Wash tomorrow, nothing clean right?" and Terminator says "Nothing clean, right". The 1st punk then says "I think this guy is a couple of cans short of a six pack!" and the Terminator then says "Your clothes, give them to me now!". The 1st punk then shouts "Fuck you, asshole!" as they bring out their flick knives and the Terminator knocks out the 1st punk and kills the second one, leaving the terrified third one to strip off his clothes. 

Then there is the scene where the Terminator goes to a gun store to get some weapons and he asks the salesmen behimd the counter for various weapons. So, the Terminator asks for "The 12 auto gauge loader" and the salesman says "That's Italian, you can go pump or auto". The Terminator then asks for "The .45 long slide with the laser sighting" and the salesman then hands him it and says "These are brand new. I just got them in. Just pull the trigger and red beam comes and you put the gun where you want the bullet to go, you can't miss". The saleman then asks "Anything else?" and the Terminator asks "Phase plasma rifle in the 40 watt range" and the salesman irritated says "Just what you see pal" and the Terminator looks above him and says "The Uzi 9mm". The salesman then get's down the Uzi and says "You sure know your weapons, buddy" but as he get's it, the Terminator helps himself to a shotgun shell and loads it into the gun and the salesman says "You can't do that!" and the Terminator aims it at the salesman and says "Wrong!" and shoots him.

And then we have the iconic scene where the Terminator enters the police station to find Sarah and he asks the desk sergeant at the front desk of her whereabouts. So, the Terminator says to the sergreant "I'm a friend of Sarah Connor's. I was told she was here, could I see her please?" and the sergeant says "You can't see her, she's making a statement" and the Terminator asks "Where is she?" and the sergeant says "Look, it could take a while, if you want to a wait, a bench is over there". The Terminator then scans the room for its structural weaknesses and looks at the sergeant and delivers the immortal line "I'll be back" and he walks out. 

Then there is the scene where the Terminator sits in his dingy motel room, reading through Sarah's address book and there is a porter outside his room, who knocks on the door. So, the poter knocks the door and asks "Hey buddy, you got a dead cat in there or what?" and the Terminator, looking all sweaty and presumably smelling from body odour visualises some response on his vision "YES, OR WHAT? GO AWAY? COME BACK LATER. FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!" and of course he selects the final one and says "Fuck you, asshole" and the porter walks away. 

And last of all is the scene where the Terminator in pursuit of Sarah and Kyle comes off his bike and goes underneath a large tanker and with the driver jumping out to check the back off the tanker, the Terminator kills him and limps toward the driver seat. So, as the Terminator get's in, the driver's passenger says "Let's get out of here" and the Terminator turns to him and we see his remaining eye socket is damaged and tells him "Get out".

Linda Hamilton is excellent as Sarah Connor, a young lass who basically went from having an ordinary life, working as a waitress, living with her somewhat self absorbed flatmate Ginger, to being thrown into the chaos of playing a crucial part in the fate of the future of the world, and being hunted relentlessly by an unstoppable enemy. Linda also makes that nice transition from a young scared woman, into a strong independent fighter by the end of the film.  

Linda also has her share of good scenes such as the one where Sarah calls the police at the nightclub, Tech Noir. So, Sarah tells Lt Traxler, "Look don't put me on hold and don't transfer me to another department!" and Traxler says "Look don't worry I won't, can you tell me where you are?" and Sarah says "I'm in this bar called Tech Noir" and Traxler "Yeah, I know it, its on Pico. Are you alright?" and Sarah says "Yeah but I don't want to leave, I think there's a guy following me". Traxler then tells her "Look don't go into the restroom, stay visible and I'll have a police car out there in a hot minute" and Sarah says "OK" and hangs up.

Then there is the scene where Sarah patches up Reese's bullet wound on his arm under a bridge as they are on the run from the Terminator and the authorities. So, Sarah as she dresses up Reese's arm wound, asks "You're talking about things I've done in the past tense. Its driving me crazy! Are you sure you've got the right person" and Kyle smiles a little and says "I'm sure". Sarah then angrily says "Oh come on, do I look like the mother of the future?! I mean, am I tough? Organised?! I can't even balance my cheque book!!". Sarah finishes the dressing and angrily says "Look Reese, I didn't ask for this honour and I don't WANT IT! ANY OF IT!!". Kyle then tells her a message he was told by her son John and memorised it for her, so after he flexes his arm and says "That's a good field dressing" and Sarah says "You like it? Its my first".

And then there is the scene where Sarah and a badly injured Kyle, flee from the Terminator into a factory and Kyle activates some machinery to distract the Terminator. So, Sarah asks "What are you doing?" and Kyle weakly says "Cover, so he can't track us" but he soon collapses having been shot by the Terminator. So, Sarah screams at Kyle to get up as the Terminator, now in steel skeletal form, smashes its way into the factory, so Sarah grabs Kyle and shouts "On your feet, soldier! ON YOUR FEET!!!" and he finally get's up. 

This is then later followed by the moment where the Terminator, having been blown apart by a stick of dynamite, comes alive again and crawls after Sarah as she crawls her way through a hydraulic press and climbs out the other side and shuts down the gate on the Terminator, who claws at her. So, Sarah reaches for the button to activate the press and tells him "You're terminated, fucker!!" and hits the button, finally crushing the Terminator once and for all. 

And last of all is the final scene where out in the Mexican desert, we see Sarah, alone in a jeep, now pregnant with her future son and she records her thoughts on tape. So, she says into the recorder "The hardest thing is deciding what I should tell you and what not to. But I guess I've got a while yet before you're old enough to even understand the tapes. They're more for me at this point just so I can get it straight. Should I tell you about your father? Boy, that's a tough one. Will it affect your decision to send him here, knowing that he is you father? If you don't send Kyle, you can never be. God, a person can go crazy thinking about all this...". 

So, as she finishes her thought, a young Mexican boy takes her picture and an older man translates what the boy says to her "He said you are a very beautiful senioritta and he wants you to pay dollars for this photo but if you don't, his father will beat him". Sarah smiles and says "Pretty good hustle, kid" and she takes the photo and its the photo that Kyle had on him in the future we saw earlier on. The young boy says something in Spanish and Sarah asks "What did he say?" and the old man says "He said there is a storm coming" and Sarah looks ahead and says "Yes, I know" and she drives off. 

Michael Biehn is also excellent as Kyle Reese, the human resistance fighter from the future, who protects Sarah from the terminator, who he plays it pretty much straight and serious down the line, but its a good solid performance, and he captures the pain and loneliness of Reese's character very well.  

Biehn himself has plenty of good moments such as the one where he prevents the Terminator from killing Sarah, so he shoots the Terminator at the nightclub. So, Kyle runs up to Sarah and urgently tells her "Come with me if you wanna live" and we see to Sarah's disbelief, the Terminator get up slowly after being hit several shotgun rounds, and Kyle shouts at her "COME ON!!!" as Sarah get's up and they run for their lives.

Then there is the scene where in a parking lot, Kyle explains himself and what the Terminator is, so as he tells her about the Terminator being a cyborg, Sarah says "Look I am not stupid, they can't make things like that yet!" and Kyle says "Not yet, not for about 40 years". So, Sarah asks "So, are you saying its from the future?" and Kyle says "One possible future, from your point of view, I don't know tech stuff". So, Sarah asks "So, that means your from the future too?" and Kyle says "Yeah" and Sarah says "Right!" and she tries to leave the car but he stops her and she bites his hand and Kyle let's go and warns her "Cyborgs don't feel pain, I do! Don't do that again!".  Sarah then says "Just let me go" and Kyle warns her "Listen and understand! That Terminator is out there! It can't be bargained with, it can't be reasoned with and it doesn't feel pity, remorse or fear and it absolutely will not stop EVER until you are dead!". 

Another good scene is when Kyle is held at the police station and questioned by Dr Silberman, the criminal psychologist (who appears in Terminator 2 and 3) about how he came to the past and the Terminator. 

So, in the scene Silberman asks how did Kyle go through the time machine equipment to arrive in the past and why didn't he take any weapons with him. So, Kyle says "Something to do with the field of a living generator, nothing dead will go" and Silberman asks "Why?" and Kyle annoyed says "I didn't build the fucking thing!". So, Silberman then asks "So, how are you supposed to get back?" and Kyle says "I can't, nobody goes home, no one else comes through, its just him and me".  

So, in the recorded video tape later played back to Sarah, Silbermen then tries to ask more questions but Kyle grows impatient and demands "Look! You've heard enough! I've answered your questions, now I have to see Sarah Connor!". Silbermen however then says "Well, I'm afraid its not up to me" and Kyle looks incredulously and asks "Then why am I talking to you? Who's in authority here???!" and Silberman says "Reese..." and Kyle shouts "SHUT UP!". Kyle then looks straight at the camera and says "You still don't get it, do you?? He'll find her! That's what he does! That's ALL HE DOES! You can't stop him!" he then get's up and is restrained by the officers in the room as he shouts "He'll wade through you and reach down her throat and PULL HER FUCKING HEART OUT!! LET...LET GO OF ME!!!" and Silberman turns the tape off at Traxler's request as Sarah looks upset and Silberman says sheepishly "Sorry".

Then there is of course the big reveal of why Kyle came to the past and he tells Sarah of his feelings for her as they sit alone in a motel room. So, Kyle says to Sarah "John Connor gave me a picture of you once. I didn't know why at the time. It was very old - torn, faded. You were young like you are now. You seemed just a little sad. I used to always wonder what you were thinking at that moment. I memorized every line, every curve... I came across time for you, Sarah. I love you; I always have". Kyle then get's up and goes over to the table and feeling embarrassed, starts to shove the pipe bombs he made into a bag, and he says "I shouldn't have said that!" but then Sarah comes over and they start to kiss and we know the rest!

And last of all is the scene where Kyle and Sarah run into a factory and Kyle activates some machinery to cover themselves from the Terminator, who breaks its way into the factory by bashing the front door in. So, Sarah asks Kyle "What are you doing?" and Kyle tells her "Cover, so he can't track us!" but very soon, the Terminator in skeletal form, catches up to them and Kyle tells Sarah "Sarah, run!" and picks up a metal pipe and he yells at Sarah "RUN!!!!" and he takes aim at the Terminator as it nears him and he says "Come on, motherfucker!!!" and he gives it a few almighty whacks with the pipe but it soon recovers and knocks him back down the stairs.

There are also some good supporting cast performances as well, especially from Paul Winfield, as the police Lieutenant Traxler, who tries to help Sarah, before the goes down at the station.  Winfield also shares a nice bit of banter with Lance Henriksen in the film, who plays the part of one of his fellow policeman, Hal, and I like the way Traxler always cuts off what Hal says before he can finish.  

And Winfield has some good scenes that include the one where Traxler and Hal talk with each other, as Hal tells him about the two murder victims that were both named Sarah Connor. So, as the press hound them outside Traxler's office, Traxler decides to go and see them and does up his top button on his shirt. So, Traxler says to Hal "I'm going to talk to them, maybe I can get on the tube by 11pm, make these jackals work for us for a change" Traxler removes his glasses and asks Hal "How do I look?" and Hal bluntly says "Like shit, boss" and Traxler says "Your mama!" and walks outside to the press.

Then there is the scene where Traxler comforts Sarah after her and Kyle are detained at the police station. So, Traxler tells Sarah "Why don't you stay here, it will be at least an hour before your mother get's here from Big Ben" and Sarah says "I can't sleep". Traxler then says "Try" and he get's Sarah to lie down on a couch and he says "It may not look it but that couch is very comfortable" and Sarah says "Thank you".  

Earl Boen is also very good as the criminal pscyhologist, Dr Silberman, who plays him as being rather smarmy, and he would later on go to play a larger part in Terminator 2 and 3.  

Boen has a few good scenes in the film such as his first where Traxler introduces Silberman to Sarah and Silberman warmly says to her "Hi, Sarah". So, Sarah, still shaken up by her experienced asks Silberman "Are you a Doctor?" and Silberman yawns and says "Criminal psychology". Sarah then asks "Is Reese crazy?" and Silberman takes out his clipboard and pen and says "Well, that's what we're going to find out". 

And lastly there is the scene where Silberman shows the video footage of his interview with Reese, and in the video he asks Reese "Why didn't you bring any weapons with you? Like ray guns" and Reese missing his sarcasm replise "Its something to do with the field generator, nothing dead will go" and Silberman asks "Why?" and Kyle angrily says "I didn't the build the fucking thing!" and Silberman backs off and says "OK OK". So, Silberman stops the tape at one point and he then says to the Traxler "I could make a career out of this guy! Do you see how he doesn't require a shred of proof? I mean most paranoid delusions are intricate but this is brilliant!". So, he resumes the tape, which culiminates with Kyle shouting in the camera how the Terminator will find Sarah and Traxler tells Silberman to turn it off. So, Silberman does and he turns to Sarah awkwardly and says "Sorry" and Sarah after a pause asks "So, is Reese crazy?" and Silberman says "In technical terminology, he's a loon!".

Lance Henriksen is also pretty good in his role as the cop, Hal, who shares a rather comical relationship with his superior officer, Lt Traxler. 

So, I will quickly mention a couple of his scenes, such as his first one where the press are outside and Hal shows the record of the two murders of the women named Sarah Connor. So, Hal says to Traxler "Look at the name, Ed" and Traxler reads it in surprise "Sarah Connor" and Hal nods and Traxler says "A one day pattern killer" and Hal says "I hate the weird ones! Especially the press cases!". 

Then there is the scene where after Sarah watches the tape of Kyle, is shown a bullet proof vest and suggests the Terminator must have been wearing one. So, Sarah then asks about the Terminator punching his arm through the car windshield "What about his arm?" and Hal says "He might have been on PCP. He could have broken every bone in his hand and he wouldn't feel it for hours. There was this one guy..." and Traxler cuts him off and says "Thank you". 

Finally Bill Paxton makes an amusing brief cameo as the punk leader at the start of the film who taunts the naked terminator. So, in the scene the punk leader says "Nice night for a walk eh?" and the Terminator stops and repeats "Nice night for a walk". So, the 2nd punk asks "Wash day tomorrow, nothing clean right?" and the Terminator says "Nothing clean right". So, the leader then grins and says"I think this guy is a couple of cans short of a six pack!". So, the Terminator then demands "Your clothes, give them to me now!" and the punks all take out their flick knives and the leader says "Fuck you, asshole!".

DIRECTOR 

Moving onto the director, James Cameron does a great job in what was only his second feature film, having directed Piranha II, two years previously, which bombed critically and financially. Cameron also took influence from 1970's thriller, The Driver and the 1981 sci-fi thriller Mad Max 2 as well. Interestingly enough, Cameron had the idea to make the plot of the first film feature two Terminators, one of which was made of liquid metal, which would later become the plot of Terminator 2, but the technical constraints of the 1980's made his original plot not feasible to shoot as a movie. 

Cameron of course here does a terrific job at building the suspense throughout and keeps both the Terminator and Reese's intentions not truly apparent as both of them could be out to kill Sarah but its not until the nightclub scene we see what is happening with his motives. Cameron also expertly handles the action scenes, which are also very suspenseful and intense and the image of seeing the metal sekelton Terminator rise from the fire, is one of the most memorable in the film. So, overall this is definitely one of Cameron's very best films. 

VISUAL EFFECTS 

So for a change, I thought I would also mention the film's visual effects and visually the film looks very impressive given its small budget of 6.4 million dollars, the model effects of the machines in the future look great. Also great credit must go to the effects make-up of Stan Winston, for the terminator which are great as is the actual design of the terminator skeleton metal frame.  Although of course it is pretty obvious the scenes where we cut from the mechanical version of Arnie's head, to the live make-up he is given to wear! The terminator's infra-red vision effects are for their time are actually quite impressive and I quite like the way they are revealed in the chase scene after Sarah and Reese escape from the nightclub.   

The only downside to the effects is the scenes where we see the skeletal terminator stalk towards Sarah and Kyle at the end and these scenes are done using stop motion instead, which makes it look a bit false. Despite all this though, the film does very well with its efffects espeially given it was on such a meagre budget. 

MUSIC 

As for the music, the score by Brad Fiedel is excellent and very memorable, particularly the film's main theme, which plays over the start and end credits. Fiedel himself composed the score primarily for synthesizer but there are also some piano pieces, particularly for Sarah and Kyle's love scene. Fiedel's theme for the Terminator himself is also great with the effective use of a creepy synth and the mechanical heartbeat. So, overall this is definitely a fine and memorable score from Fiedel, who later go on to score Terminator 2 and True Lies for Cameron.

FLAWS 

So, does the Terminator does have any flaws worth a mention? Well, yeah there are some. 

For starters I would say the film probably like others of its time is a victim of the fashions of the 1980s, and it is populated by some cheesy 80s pop tunes, which we hear Ginger listen to on hear tape player, and the scene in the nightclub and when Kyle turns on the car radio.  So, overall the film does have a pretty dated feel but despite that, it still  of course works. 

Another scene that bugged me somewhat is where the Terminator has Sarah in his sights with his laser sighted gun and she doesn't move or anything and sits still with a blank expression waiting to be shot! I mean its clear as day, the Terminator means to kill her yet she just sits there and does nothing at all to protect herself, such as run or even duck under the table! So, yeah its a pretty daft moment in itself and just as well Kyle turned up at this point to shoot the Terminator. 

Then there is of course the question as to why didn't the Terminator ever think to wash itself and give itself a bath or a shower???!  As surely its skeletal frame would be able to cope with water, as it can certainly cope with fire!  The scene where the housekeeper in the motel knocks on the terminator's door and asks if he has a dead cat in there or what, is quite funny, especially when the terminator responds by telling the housekeeper to go f himself, but it also highlights the terminator has no regard or concern for trying to fit in and not drawing attention to itself by stinking out the place. But wouldn't it make a bit more sense if it did, rather than walking round with stinky BO?! But ah well, the Terminator doesn't care about his hygiene even if he does care a little about his hair, as we catch him fluff his hair a bit in the mirror after he puts back on his shades after removing his damaged eyeball.

And I always thought the line where Sarah finally kills off the terminator by crushing it in the hyrdaulic press, and saying "you're terminated, fucker!" was a bit unecessary, as I think it would be better if she just said "you're terminated!", or at least they could have made it funny by her saying "you're terminated, bitch!" or "you're terminated, shithead!".   

You could also argue that the Terminator lucked out in finding someone who's clothes would be a good fit for him in the last standing punk at the start, who strips off to give the Terminator his clothes. So, the fact that the punk's clothing fitted the Terminator so well, is a pretty neat coincidence if nothing else! Although they did make up for this in the sequel where the Terminator analyses one of the bikers in the bar at the start for his build to assess if his clothes were suitable.  

Anyway that's it for the flaws.

SUM UP

So, in the end The Terminator still to this day remains a must see classic action film thanks to its suspenseful and relentless action and fine performances from Linda Hamilton and Michael Biehn, not to mention Arnie is perfect in his role as the ruthless killing machine, the Terminator. James Cameron also provides some tight direction throughout and the music score by Brad Fiedel is also very memorable and the special effects of the film are also impressive given the film's small budget. And out of all the Terminator films, the original is still unquestionably the best.

So, I will rate The Terminator:

10 out of 10 

So, that's it for now and to paraphrase Arnie, "I will be back" for another post soon! 

Until then bye for now!