Doctor Who - The Robots of Death Revisited "Would you like a jelly baby?"

OK, I have to admit to holding my hands up and admit to being somewhat lazy here as I realise this is yet ANOTHER revisitation of a review I did a good while back on this blog and the post in question is on another Doctor Who story from the Tom Baker era, The Robots of Death.

So, apologies for all the revisitations but its just so I can get some content out there and will promise to try and do some new posts with new content (promise!).

So, with that all said, let's take another at this classic which is now 42 years old and see if it still is a classic...

And the usual warning is coming...

SPOILERS ARE AHEAD!!!

STORY

OK, so the story is set onboard a large sandmining vehicle, which is manned by a human crew of nine as well as a number of servant robots, whom are classed in three categories, dumbs, who are mute and carry out simply tasks, Vocs, which can speak and Super Vocs, who control all the robots.  Most of the humans onboard however are accepting of the robots, apart from one, Chub (Rob Edwards) a meteorologist, who not too long after is found murdered in a storage room.

Meanwhile, the TARDIS materialises inside one of the scoops of the sandminer and the Doctor and his companion, Leela (Louise Jameson) look around.  However as they do so, the crew of the sandminer remove the TARDIS from inside the scoop as it was blocking it and the Doctor and Leela are soon found by the robots, who take them to a room where they are to wait.  The Doctor then uses his sonic screwdriver to unlock the door and he looks for the TARDIS and Leela wanders off and watches some robots take away Chub's dead body.

The human crew in the meantime suspect the Doctor and Leela, since they are stowaways, are responsible for the murder and by the time they are recaptured, the Doctor finds the body of another crew member, Keril and Leela finds a third dead man, Cass aswell as a Dum robot, which can speak.  The ship's commander, Uvanov (Russell Hunter) decides that the Doctor and Leela are locked up inside the ship's robot storage bay.  However, the Doctor and Leela are soon released by one of the other crew, Poul (David Collings) who believes that they were not responsible for the murders. Poul then shows the Doctor and Leela where Chub was murdered and the Doctor suggests that Chub may have been murdered by a robot. 

Meanwhile, one of the female crew members, Zilda (Tania Rogers) heads to Uvanov's quarters where she breaks down crying and over the tannoy system accuses Uvanov of being the murderer, however she herself is soon killed by one of the robots.  And to make matters, the controls onboard the sandminer are soon sabotaged as the controller for the sandminer's motors, Borg (Brian Croucher) is also murdered, which causes the sandminer's engines to run out of control.  However the Doctor soon steps in and saves the sandminer from being destroyed by cutting the motor power and one of the remaining crew, Dask (David Bailie) repairs the motors.  Leela also at this point helps tend to one of the senior crewmembers, Toos (Pamela Salem) who is wounded during the encounter.

The Doctor not long after goes to visit the Dum robot that can speak, D84 (Gregory de Polnay) who reveals that itself and Poul are in fact undercover agents for the sandminer's company, who were sent as a precaution in case a robot uprising took place as there are rumours of such an uprising occuring at the hands of a renegade scientist, Taren Capel.  And the Doctor soon suspects that Taren Capel himself is onoard and he has been tampering with the programming of the robots in order to make them kill. 

And from here the Doctor must try and find a way to stop the malicious robots from killing the remaining crew and save humanity from the prospect of the robot uprising......

THOUGHTS

It has to be said that while The Robots of Death is often regarded as one of the classics of the Tom Baker era and its easy enough to see why as it is an excellent story overall if it I'd dare say it doesn't quite hit classic status its not far off.  However I would have to say though the story itself is no more than an Agatha Christie-esque "Whodunnit" or in this case a "Doctor-whodunnit!".

Regardless of this though the story does have some excellent visuals effects with the exterior shots of the sandminer, imaginative costume designs for the crewmembers and the robot costumes are also excellent.  And the robots themselves also make for pretty creepy and effective enemies, despite their benevolent tone of voice.  And to the story's credit it also does a fine job at continuing to develop Leela's character as she just joined the Doctor in the previous story (The Face of Evil) and to the story's credit they also work well together here.

PERFORMANCES AND NOTABLE SCENES (Warning: this section may contain spoilers!)

As for the performances, well they are all very good with both the regular and supporting case in fine form.

Starting with Tom Baker, who is great once again as the Doctor and he has his share of good moments here and great lines. 

And I will mention a few scenes of his such as the one at the start where the TARDIS has just materialised in the sandminer scoop and just before they go outside, Leela picks up one of her Sevateem warrior weapons and the Doctor tells her she won't need it.  And he says to her "You won't need that" and Leela asks "How do you know?" and the Doctor tells her "I never carry weapons. If people see you mean them no harm, they never hurt you. Nine times out of ten!".

Then there is the scene where the Doctor is captured and taken to the human crew members and as he waits around to be spoken to, he offers one of the crewmembers, Borg, a jellybaby.  And the Doctor says to Borg "Would you like a jelly baby?" but Borg angrily knocks the Doctor's bag of jelly babies out his hand and he shouts "SHUT UP!!" and the Doctor then quietly says "A simple no thank you, would have been sufficient". 

And in the next moment, the Doctor is questioned by Uvanov, who asks the Doctor "What are you doing here?" and the Doctor grins and says "Just standing here, talking to you!".  Then after this, Uvanov suggests either one of the crew murdered the others or the Doctor and Leela did, but then the Doctor offers "There is one other possibility you seem to have overlooked".  And Borg angrily says to the Doc "We've heard quite enough out of you!" and the Doctor then says "You know, you're a classic example of the inverse ratio between the size of the mouth and the size of the brain!".

Then there is the scene where the Doctor tells Leela about the mental disorder, Robophobia, which one of the crew, Poul suffers from later on.  And the Doctor says to Leela "Its an unreasoning dread of robots. You see, most living creatures use non-verbal signals. Body movement, eye contact, facial expression, that sort of thing".  And the Doctor continues, saying "It undermines a certain type of personality, causes identity crisis, paranoia, sometimes even personality disintegration. Robophobia".   And as Leela continues to ask the Doctor more questions as he takes apart the remains of the inoperative robot's head, he suddenly snaps at Leela "Do you have to talk so much?!" and Leela sheepishly says "Sorry".

WARNING: BIG SPOILER COMING UP IN THE NEXT TWO PARAGRAPHS!

And lastly there is the scene near the end (SPOILER!!!) where the Doctor is strapped to a bench by the villainous Taren Capel (OK I won't at this stage give away who he is!).  And the Doctor looks at him and tells him "You look ridiculous in that outfit.  You're not half the robot your father was!" and Capel shouts "You insolent animal!" and then proceeds to torture the Doctor with a laser probe device.

However the day is soon won as the Doctor overcomes Capel (SPOILER!!) by giving Leela a canister of helium to alter Capel's voice so he won't be recognised by the robots and they won't obey his orders.  And after the menace is done, Leela's voice is squeaky from the helium and the Doctor on hearing voice says "Ah, a mouse in the wainscoting!" and he opens the cubby hole where she hides and says "Well squeaked, mouse!".

Louise Jameson is also pretty good (and pretty sexy it has to be said in that leather skin outfit of hers!) as Leela, the Doctor's new companion at this stage and she shares some good scenes with Tom throughout the story. At this time, Louise was still wearing her brown eyed contact lenses and it wouldn't be until the first story of the 15th season, Horror of Fang Rock before

And I will mention a few of Louise's scenes such as the one near the start where Leela plays with the Doctor's yo-yo, but she thinks it to be a magical device and cautiously keep the yo-yo going.  And Leela asks the Doctor "Doctor?  Can I stop now?" and the Doctor says "If you want to" and Leela asks "It will not affect this?" and the Doctor says "No, its a yo-yo.  Its a game.  I thought you were enjoying it".  And Leela all of a sudden drops the yo-yo, annoyed, she says "Enjoying it?! You said I had to keep it going up and down. I thought it was part of the magic!" and the Doctor asks her "Magic, Leela. Magic?" and she sighs and says "I know, I know.  There's no such thing as magic".

And then the Doctor tries to explain to Leela how the TARDIS is bigger inside than out and the Doctor uses two boxes, one big and one small to explain and how "If you could keep that exactly that distance away and have it here, the large one would fit inside the small one" and Leela simply looks at the Doctor and says "That's silly!".

Then we have the scene where Leela is found and captured by Uvanov after she has discovered one of the murdered crew.  And Uvanov asks Leela "Can you think of any good reason why I should not have you executed on the spot?" and Leela tells him "No, but you can, otherwise you would have done it!".  And then Poul enters and looks surprised at Leela and says to her "You must be stronger than you look!" and Leela almost smiles and says "You must stupider than you look if you think I did that!" and Leela is soon taken out the room and she shouts "I didn't kill him!  I DIDN'T KILL HIM!!".

And lastly there is the scene where the Doctor and Leela are visited by Poul, while they are held captive onboard the sandminer.  However, Leela is wary of Poul's motives for being on the ship and she says to the Doctor "Be careful of him, Doctor.  He's not what he seems" and Poul, surprised asks "Well, you move like a hunter.  Watch all the time".  And as Poul unlocks the Doctor's restraints, Leela catches Poul's attention to unlock hers and he does so and she says in a rather uncharacterstically posh way "Thank you!".

And last of all is the final moment of the story where Leela asks the Doctor "Doctor, why didn't the helium make your voice go squeaky?" and the Doctor tells her " Because I'm a Time Lord. I've been around, you know. Two hearts, respiratory bypass system. I haven't lived seven hundred and fifty years without learning something. After you". So, as Leela enters the TARDIS, the Doctor teases her  "Little mouse". 

As for the supporting cast members Russell Hunter is very good as Commander Uvanov, who's character is entirely motivated by money as he commands the sandminer in its search for ore minerals.  However Uvanov (SPOILER!) soon turns his way of thinking around as he helps the Doctor and Leela fight against the robot uprising. 

And Hunter has some good scenes such as the one where Uvanov confronts Leela after she has found one of the dead crew members, Cass and D84 having found Leela before Uvanov enters the room, pretends to be a dumb robot (as D class robots can't speak but D84 is undercover). 

So, in the scene Uvanov angrily says to Leela of D84 as she asks the robot to tell Uvanov that she didn't kill Cass "That is a single function labour robot, D class. D for dumb. It can't speak!" and Leela sharply says of D84 "Has anyone ever told HIM that?!". Uvanov then angrily says to Leela "You have cost me and company a great deal of money and you have killed three people. Can you think of any good reason why I should not have you executed on the spot?!" and Leela replies "No, but you can, otherwise you would have done it!" and Uvanov tells her "Now don't get smart with me!"

Then there is the scene where Uvanov confronts one of his disgruntled crew, Zilda, who has a clear dislike for him. So, in the scene Uvanov tells the others after a few of the crew have been murdered "There are fewer of us now. We'll each get a larger share, if that's any consolation" and Zilda sharply tells him "No, commander. That isn't any consolation". So, Uvanov walks up close behind Zelda and asks her irritably "Tell me, Zilda. Why do you hate me so much?" and Zilda aloofly says "You flatter yourself, commander!". Uvanov then tells Zilda bluntly "Well, let me tell you something. By the time this trip is over, I'll have more money than you or your fancy family ever dreamed of!".

Another good scene is when Uvanov tells the Doctor and the others that he recognises Poul's symptoms of robophobia. And the Doctor asks Uvanov "Do you know what's wrong with Poul, Uvanov?" and Uvanov grimly says "Yes.  Robophobia" and the Doctor says "Yes, that's right.  The Loid called it Grimwade syndrome".  And Uvanov continues to tell a story of how one of his former crewmates suffered from it "I have seen it, Doctor, once before. My very first command. A young kid just ran outside the mine. I tried to save him, but I couldn't. I'll never, ever, forget the look on his face".

And lastly there is the scene where Uvanov manages to destroy one of the robots with a makeshift explosive and he says to Toos as they leave the command deck to find other robots "Do you know what I think, Toos? I think it's high time we went on the offensive!!" but Toos warns him "We might not be so lucky a second time!".

Pamela Salem also does pretty well in her role as Toos, the ship's second in command, who later helps the Doctor and Leela in their struggle against the robots and of course the mysterious Taren Capel. 

And I will just mention a few of Pamela's scenes such as the one where Toos is in her cabin resting  however SV-7, quietly enters her quarters, seemingly with the intent to kill her but SV-7 draws back just as she wakens.  And as SV-7 updates her on the situation, Toos then says "You may go now, but keep me informed. Oh, and find the girl Leela and bring her to me. Tell her my arm hurts" but SV-7 offers "The commander is in pain?  I will take her to sickbay".  However Toos says "No, no, no.  Just bring her to me" but SV-7 does not appear to hear her and Toos again says "Well, do, as I say!" and SV-7 obeys "Yes, Commander". 

Another scene is when the Doctor contacts her over the radio and warns her that the robots are responsible for the killings and urges her to get everyone else to the command deck.  So, the Doctor tells Toos "Listen, Toos. I know its the robots that are doing the killing" and Toos says "Robots?! That's impossible! Robots can't kill!". The Doctor then tells her "Well of course they can if they've been modified to it and some of them already have been. Where are you?" and Toos tells the Doctor "I'm in my cabin". So, the Doctor tells Toos to get everyone to the command deck but Toos is relcutant to do so and is that clear but she says "No, it isn't. Its impossible that the..." and the Doctor seriously tells her "Just DO IT, Toos!" and Toos sighs and says "Alright".

However at this point, one of the robots turns up outside her door and she opens it and says to the robot "Attend to your duties" but the robot holds up a corpse marker and she screams and shuts the door quickly "Get away!!". However as the door shuts, the robot's hand is stuck in the door, so Toos grabs a small vase to knock the hand away and she yells "Please go away! GET OUT!" and she knocks the robot's hand off which clunks loudly on the floor. Toos terrified then get's back on the radio to the Doctor and she says "Doctor! Help me, please. Its outside!" and the Doctor asks "What's outside" and Toos tells him "A robot. Its trying to kill me!". D84 then volunteers to go and help Toos and Toos fearfully pleads with the Doctor "Help me please" and the Doctor says "Help is on the way" and Toos says "Itd better hurry!" and the Doctor tells her "It IS hurrying".

David Bailie is also pretty good in his role as Dask, one of the crew, who is not all he seems to be at first in the story.

And these include the scene where not long after the first murder has taken place (the crew member, Chub) Uvanov holds the corpse marker in his hand and he asks if anyone knows what it is. So, Dask volunteers and tells the others "Its a corpse marker. Robot deactivation disc. They use them in the construction centres. If ever we used the stop circuit and turned off all our robots, they'd have to go back to a construction centre for reactivation. On arrival, each would be marked with a disc like that to show it was a deactivated robot. The technicians call them corpse markers. It's a sort of a joke".

Dask sneaks around the robot storage bay and looks at a badly damage robot and he says "Irreparable!" and places a corpse marker on it (a circular red sticker device used to mark a deactivated robot).  And as Dask leaves the storage bay, he meets Poul, who looks at him suspiciously and asks "What are you doing?" and Dask replies "My job" and walks off.

WARNING: BIG SPOILER COMING UP IN THE NEXT TWO PARAGRAPHS!

Then there is the scene where Dask is revealed to be the main villain, Taren Capel as he pretends to be plead with Uvanov and Toos to open the command deck doors.  And we cut to Dask outside, now with his face painted to resemble a robot and he shouts "LET ME IN!!!!" and he turns to the robots and says "All right, my brothers.  The doors.  Force them open!!". 

And lastly there is the scene where Dask has captured the Doctor and straps him to a bench and prepares to use a laser probe to torture him.  And the Doctor mockingly asks Dask "Are you going to tell me your plan for running the universe???" and Dask says "No, Doctor. I'm going to burn out your brain.  Very, very slowly!".  And the Doctor insults Dask's outfit as being ridiculous, which angers Dask who shouts "Insolent animal!" and he proceeds to use the laser probe to torture the Doctor.  And after the Doctor asks Dask of his robot upbringing and Dask says to him "Yes, Doctor.  I was brought up a superior being. Brought up to realise my brothers should live as free beings, and not as slaves to human dross!".

David Collings is excellent as Poul, the undercover company agent, who is sent onboard with D84 as a precautionary measure against any risk of a robot uprising.

And Collings has some good moments also that include the scene where Poul meets with the Doctor and Leela after they have been captured and restrained in the robot storage bay as he believes they might be innocent of the murders they have been accused of. And Poul says to the Doctor "Never mind about me. What matters to you is Commander Uvanov. I know him, and I know it's only a matter of time before he decides that it's a waste of food, water and labour keeping you alive". And the Doctor asks "Does that concern you?" and Poul says "I didn't think you did it. I know she (Leela) couldn't have strangled Cass, not without knocking him out first, and there's no sign of that. So tell me what you know and I'll try to help you".

And in the next scene, Poul takes the Doctor and Leela to the storage area where Chub was killed and the Doctor asks Poul what Chub was doing there. And Poul tells the Doctor of Chub "Oh, we were on a run up to a storm. He came to get an instrument package to send up in one of his weather ballons". And the Doctor points to one of the packages on a storage shelf "Is that one of his packages?" and Poul says "Yes, I think it is" and the Doctor says "Good. Imagine you're Chub, pass me one of those packages". So, Poul tries to grab one of the boxes but it won't move and he says "Its jammed, it won't move" and the Doctor hurriedly says "Come on, come on! In those circumstances you'd be in a hurry. What would you do?!" and it dawns on Poul what the Doctor means "Well, I'd...I'd call for a robot".

Another good scene from Collings is when Poul finds Uvanov in Zilda's cabin who has already been murdered and Poul is suspicious of Uvanov. So, in the scene after Uvanov laments over Zilda's death he turns to Poul and says to him "Get the tin brains to make another search and this time do it thoroughly!". However, Poul is convinced Uvanov is guilty and firmly tells him "No, Uvanov" and he stands infront of Uvanov who wants to go and tells Poul "Get out of my way, Poul" but Pouly angrily tells Uvanov "I'm confining you to quarters and relieving you of command!". Uvanov looks stunned and says "You're what?! She was dead when I got here!" but Poul angrily asks him "What were you doing then?! Making doubly sure?!" but Uvanovi tries to brush past him only then for Poul to knock him out.

Gregory de Polnay is also pretty good as the voice of D84, a robot who is secretly an undercover agent on boartd, and D84 remains one of the stories more sympathetic and likeable characters in the story. 

And I will only mention one scene for Gregory and its the one where Leela discovers a dead body in a crew quarters and D84 springs up behind her and he says "Please do not cry out.  It is important that I am not found here".  And Leela says "Obviously" and D84 tells her "If I had killed him, would I have not killed you, too?". 

Brian Croucher is also worth a mention here in his role as Borg, one of the crew onboard the sandminer, who is soon to fall victim of the robot uprising. 

So for time (again!) I will mention just one scene from Brian and that's the one where, Borg is briefly suspected of murdering Chub as he appeared to harbour a grudge against him.  But Borg protests and says "Now look, I had nothing against Chub.  OK, he talked too much but...".  And as the crew continue to discuss the situation, Borg says "Not just a murderer, then. Seems like one one of us is a maniac!".  However one of the crew, Cass tells Borg "Use your brain, Borg. We would know, wouldn't we?" and Borg approaches Casa and says "But we don't" and he places the corpse marker found form Chub's body on Cass's hand and Borg adds "Do we?".

And last of all Miles Fothergil also does well in providing the calm, soothing voice of the Super Voc robot, SV-7, who controls all the other robots, but SV-7 also falls foul to Taren Capel's evil plans.  And again Forthergil's calm voice is nicely at odds with SV-7's altered, violent behaviour later on in the story.

And I will mention two of Fothergil's scenes with the first being the one where SV-7 goes to Toos's quarters with the seeming intent to kill her in her sleep but as he approaches her she awakens and he backs off.

So, in the scene Toos looks up and asks what SV-7 wants and he says "Commander Uvanov has gone" and Toos asks "Gone?" and SV-7 tells her "His voice pattern was still in the command programme. The guard unit accepted his order for release". Toos then asks "Why didn't you erase his voice pattern?" and SV-7 says "You gave no such instruction" so Toos tells SV-7 to erase the pattern. Toos then asks SV-7 if there have been any further developments and he says "There have been some localised failures in the main power system, resulting in door and light malfunctions. I have detailed circuit tracers to correct the faults". Toos then asks SV-7 to bring Leela to her cabin to treat her injured arm but SV-7 offers to help "The Commander is in pain. I will take her to the sick bay" and Toos somewhat annoyed tells SV-7 "No, no. Just bring her to me" but SV-7 doesn't respond and Toos firmly tells him "Well, do as I say" and SV-7 says "Yes, Commander" and leaves.  

And last of all is the scene where after SV-7's programming has been tampered with by Taren Capel to make him kill humans, SV-7 hands out some corpse markers to the other robots. So, SV-7 says to them "Our Controller has ordered the death of the remaining humans. 6, you will go now and kill Acting Commander Toos" and V6 takes the marker. SV-7 then gives out another to V4 "The Doctor" and then one to V5 "Leela" and SV-7 calmly says "And I will kill the others".

DIRECTOR AND MUSIC
 
Finally getting onto the show's director, Michael E. Briant does a fine job here with the story and he paces it out pretty for the most part and provides quite a few moments of tension and suspense off and on throughout.  Briant also previously directed two serials during the Jon Pertwee era of the show, namely The Sea Devils and The Green Death, so this is another fine effort from Briant here once again.

As for the music duties, once again they belong to the show's then regular composer, Dudley Simpson, who once more provides another good score for the show and it features nice moments of grandiose sounding melodrama.  But the score also has some unsettling moments of the quiet that work well during the scenes where we see the robots point of view as they walk the corridors, looking for their prey.  So overall its what you'd come to expect from Dudley and there's nothing much wrong with that.

FLAWS (Warning: this section may also contain spoilers!)
As for flaws....yes, The Robots of Death is not a perfect story, so there are some to be found.

And to start off one of the problems with the story is just like with The Deadly Assassin, they give away the identity of the villain a bit too soon as in episode three when we see SV-7 given his secret orders to presumably kill, we see the distorted image on a large video screen that looks suspiciously like Dask!  And if you listen to the voice at that point you can even tell that its Dask, although it is a bit more subtle than The Deadly Assassin was in that regard.  But it still stands that you know too early on who the real villain of the story is! 

Further to this point, I also felt by the time we've reached episode three there are only a few male crew members left in the story except the Doctor, Uvanov and Poul aswell as Dask, so it makes you really think, it can only really be Dask that is the villain out of them! I mean Uvanov was unconscious and subdued in his cabin (by Poul), Poul suffers a mental collapse from robophobia and well, the Doctor is the Doctor! ;-) So by that logic, Dask is the only one not accounted for, so he obviously must be the villain. 


I also felt that the story also lacked much in the way of interesting characters as they are all mainly pretty cynical, spoilt or in Uvanov's case, greedy money grubbers!  The exception to the rule here is D84, who is the most unique character in the story and the only one with which you can really empathise given that he is secret robot agent, who helps out the Doctor and later (SPOILER!) sacrifices himself.

Then there is the whole idea of Dask's masterplan, or rather an inherent lack of it, as it would appear that Dask would intend to take control of all the robots in the known civilisation and have them rule the world.  However Dask never really reveals any more other than this, so you are just left to wonder what he intended beyond this one simple statement and this remains one of the weaker aspects of this story, because basically Dask is a pretty weak villain and not well written.

And on a side issue, which is more a technical issue with the story that had always bugged me about this story, is the scene where Chub is killed we hear his scream off camera but the scream itself is horribly dubbed over and it sounds awful.  In fact whenever I see that scene it kind of makes me cringe and wonder why in the hell didn't they just have him scream properly off camera than use a bloody awful sounding dub. 

And lastly I think it is also safe to say that the story's ending is wrapped up just a little too quickly and the Doctor and Leela sneak off in the TARDIS without even bothering to say goodbye to Uvanov and Toos, which makes you think that they had somewhat rushed the writing of this story.

Anyway that's it for the flaws.

SUM UP

So to sum up, The Robots of Death is a very enjoyable story from the Tom Baker era of the show even if it isn't quite an outright classic imho it comes close enough.  And given that this story was chosen to represent the Baker era as part of the show's 50th anniversary by the British Film Institute, it makes you really think that they could have chosen a better one than this as there are plenty of other classic stories that would have better fit the bill.

Anyway regardless of this, the story is still worth checking out despite any of its flaws and The Robots of Death has worn well after 40 years and its visuals, set design and good performances commend it well enough as a solid, if not classic entry from the Tom Baker era.

So, that's it for now and I will be back soon with yet another post next month.

Till then its bye the now!

Doctor Who - The Talons of Weng Chiang (Revisited) "I'll buy you some muffins!"

Well, its that time again where I get lazy (yep!) and wrack my way through the vaults of my blog and dig out a former post that needs updating and the one I have gone for is one of the all time classic Doctor Who stories from the Tom Baker era, The Talons of Weng Chiang.

So, is it still a classic??? Well, let's take another look...

STORY

So the story begins with the TARDIS landing in London back in the Victorian times, as the Doctor and Leela (Louise Jameson) emerge wearing Victorian clothes.  The Doctor and Leela while they look around the local area, they hear a scream and they find a group of Chinese coolies who are attacking a cab driver.  The Doctor and Leela fight them off, as they hear the sound of a police whistle they flee, and the Doctor trips up one of them, just in time for a Sergeant (David McKail) to find them and he asks them to come to the station.

Meanwhile at the Palace theatre, a famous Chinese magician, Li H'sen Chang (John Bennett) is performing an extended run at the theatre, much to the delight of the owner, Henry Gordon Jago (Christopher Benjamin).  Chang however was accosted by the cab driver earlier on and he accused  him of putting his wife into some weird trance and since then she has disappeared.  After this Chang is called to the police station where he is asked to be an interpreter for the coolie, the Doctor and Leela caught.  Chang unbeknowst to the Doctor and Leela discretely gives the coolie a scorpion venom pill, which kills the coolie instantly.  Chang denies that he did anything and wishes them good night, but on examining the dead coolie's hand, the Doctor sees a tatoo of the Tong of the Black Scorpion, who were a dangerous political organisation who worshipped the ancient god, Weng Chiang.

The Doctor and Leela then head to the mortuary where they find where they speak to Professot Litefoot (Trevor Litefoot) who is examining the bodies and tells the Doctor that the cab driver, was a man named Joseph Buller, who's with Emma Buller went missing, and this was just one of several girls that have gone missing in mysterious circumstances.  The Doctor finds rat hairs on Buller's body, which suggests to him that he was killed by a large rat, and that the god Weng Chaing, was the master of abundance who could make things grow.  On this hunch, the Doctor checks the sewers with Leela and they find a large rat, which advances on them, but they manage to escape just in time.

In the meantime we find out that Chang is actually a servant of the so called God, Weng Chiang, who is in fact a war criminal from the 51st Century, Magnus Greel (Michael Spice) who is stranded in this time, and he is desparately looking for the time cabinet he travelled in.  However as a result of having used the time cabinet, which is based on an unstable form called Zygma energy, Greel is left hideously deformed and has to wear mask to hide his true features.

It also is revealed that the girls who disappeared have in fact been captured by Chang and taken to Greel, who uses a distillation chamber to drain their life energies into his own body, in order to revitilise himself, as he dying from the effects of his time travel.  Chang also in his task of trying to find the time cabinet is aided by a the small waxwork doll, Mr Sin (Roy Deep) which is in fact a homunculus (small robotic human) who came from the future with Greel.

And as things progress the Doctor and Leela eventually cross paths with Greel, as well as meeting up with Jago and Litefoot, who all pull their resources together to try and defeat the evil villain from the future, who if he finds the time cabinet again, it could have disastrous consequences for them all.

THOUGHTS 

The Talons of Weng Chiang is without a doubt one of the real highlights of the Tom Baker era, the scripts, sets and performances are all excellent.  Robert Holmes, who was the script editor during the Philip Hinchcliffe tenure, and also wrote the story, has crafted a terrific adventure, which is creepy, menacing as well as very entertaining.

The story also succeeds in bringing together another partnership, with Henry Gordon Jago and Professor Litefoot, who in the story make an unlikely duo, but they ultimatley help each other and the Doctor in their fight against Greel.  In fact in a way it seems like there is a pecular trio here, a la Sherlock Homes style (which this story pays more than a close homage to) with the Doctor being Sherlock Holmes and Professor Litefoot being John Watson.  As for the gothic themes that were seen to be running now and then through the Hinchcliffe era, they really come to the fore here, and in this story Holmes and Hinchcliffe find the perfect balance of drama and fun.

PERFORMANCES (Warning: this section may contain spoilers!) 

In terms of the performances there is much to enjoy here as the cast are all on top form.

Starting Tom Baker who is great once again as the Fourth Doctor, and he provides his usual commanding, engimatic and humorous qualities. 

And Tom has his share of good scenes such as the one where Doctor goes to the police station not long after he and Leela are attacked by some coolies. So, the Doctor in the scene is asked by Sergeant Kyle at the station some questions and he asks the Doctor if and Leela have an address, so the Doctor tells him "No, sergeant, we're travellers". So, Kyle says "I see. Persons of no fixed abode" and the Doctor corrects him "No, no. We have an abode but its not fixed!" and Kyle says to the Doctor "I can give you and the girl a fixed abode quite easily, sir" and the Doctor says under his breath "Flat-footed imbecile!" and Kyle asks "What was that, sir?" and the Doctor irritably says "It was nothing complimentary, get on with it, Sergeant!".

So, as Kyle says they have their hands full with all the missing persons enquiries, the Doctor impatiently tells him "Sergeant, that is all irrelevant. I have come here to lay evidence!". Kyle however says "We'll come to that in good time, sir" and the Doctor shouts " We'll come to that now, Sergeant. We've just prevented a kidnapping, a robbery or even a murder. My friend here caught one of the attackers. Let's come to it now, shall we?!".

Then there is the scene where Chang arrives at the police station where Kyle asks him to question the Chinese coolie. However, Chang in the scene quietly slips a poison pill to the coolie, who takes it and as the Doctor finally works out who Chang is, he announces "Got it! Li H'sen Chang! The master of magic mesmerism! Show us a trick!" and suddenly the coolie gives a cry and collapses dead over the table. So, the Doctor examines the coolie and says "Scorpion venom!" and Kyle asks "Scorpion venom?" and the Doctor says "Highly concentrated scorpion venom. It killed him almost instantly". 

So, Chang then denies any knowledge of what just happened and leaves the station and the Doctor having examined the coolie and identified a tattoo belonging to a criminal group known as the Tong of the black scorpion, he says to Kyle "If the tong of the Black scorpion is here in London you're going to need all the help you can get, now cut along and do what I say now!".

And there is the moment where the Doctor chases Greel around the Palace Theatre late at night and he finds Jago later on the floor unconscious and brings him round. So, as Greel escapes, the Doctor tends to Jago, who asks "Shouldn't we go to the police?" and the Doctor says "Oh, Henry Gordon Jago, then our reclusive phantom would simply vanish.  Poof!" and as Jago asks him what he will do the Doctor replies "Think.  Then have some supper!".       

And there is also the scene where the Doctor traverses the Thames in a small boat as he holds an old rifle in his hands and he says to Litefoot, who is with him "My dear Litefoot, I've got a lantern, a pair of waders, and possibly the most feared piece of hand artillery in all of England!  What could possibly go wrong??".  And as Litefoot says "Well that for a start, it hasn't been used for 50 years, if you try and use it, it might explode in your face!" and the Doctor replies "Explode??  Unthinkable!  It was made in Birmingham!".

There is also another amusing scene when the Doctor looks at Leela's transformation when she puts on a beautiful Victorian era dress. So, the Doctor says to Leela "I'll be proud to take you to the theatre lookign like that" and Leela excitedly asks "We're going to the theatre?" and the Doctor with a grin  says to her "I have an appointment at the Palace Theatre tonight, and if you are very good, I'll buy you an orange".

Another great scene is where Greel turns up at Lightfoot's place to take the time key for the cabinet from the Doctor.  So in the scene, Greel grows tired of the Doctor's flipancy and he shouts "The time key, Doctor!" and the Doctor says "Oh the time key!  Heavens to Betsy!  I'm always putting things down and wondering where I put them!". So, Greel warns the Doctor "I will give you three seconds to produce the time key or I will kill the girl...one...two...three...kill her!" but then the Doctor suddenly produces the key and Greel shouts "Stop!". So, as Greel urgently shouts "Give it to me!" the Doctor jumps back and says "Careful! I might have dropped it!" and Greel says to the Doctor of Leela "Give me that key and I'll spare her life!" and the Doctor tells him "Never trust a man with dirty fingernails!".

So, the Doctor insists that he will only give Greel the key if he takes him to the House of the Dragon and he releases Jago and Litefoot. So, the Doctor tells Greel "Tell you what, I'll give you the trionic lattice when we get to the House of the Dragon" and Greel asks him "What trickery is this?!" and the Doctor says "No trickery. You're holding two of my friends there. I want them released". Greel then asks "Two blundering dolts?! Why?!" and the Doctor tells him "I doubt you could understand that but that's the condition" so Greel agrees to. So, before they go, Greel tells them to bring the girl but the Doctor says "No! The girl stays" and Greel warns the Doctor "You would be wise not to press me too far!" and the Doctor commandingly says to him "Just lead on".

WARNING BIG SPOILER COMING UP IN THIS PARAGRAPH!

And last of all is the scene where the Doctor and the others are caught up in a fight with Greel at the House of the Dragon where Mr Sin has the Doctor and his friends caught in the crosshairs of a dragon laser gun. So, the Doctor pleads with Greel not to use the time cabinet or there will be disaster "Greel, listen, if you activate the Zigma beam, it will be certain death for all of us!" and Greel weakly says "Lies, Doctor!". However the Doctor continues to plead with Greel "Listen, Greel! GREEL, LISTEN! The Zigma beam is at full stretch. If you trigger it again, it'll mean certain collapse. You know what that means?!". Greel however weakly says "You can't fool me!" and the Doctor shouts "There'll be a huge implosion, Greel, and you'll be at the centre of it. The zigma experiments were a disaster!"


So, after the Doctor finally defeats Greel by pushing him into the distillation chamber, it disintegrates Greel's body. So, Jago asks "But where was he from? Where did he go?" and the Doctor tells him "He was a foe from the future, Henry". Then suddenly Mr Sin jumps down and attacks Leela and then the Doctor, who wrestles with Sin and throws him to the floor and he pulls out the chip that controls him and he takes the trionic lattice and places it on the ground and says to the others "I'm bringing the Zigma experiments to an end". So, the Doctor crushes the lattice with his foot and then we hear a call in the distance of muffins and the Doctor says to the other "Its the muffin man. Come on, i'll buy you some muffins!". 

Louise Jameson is also fine as Leela, and yep she does look pretty fine in that Victorian dress (although I miss her sexy leather skins!).

And Louise has quite a few highlights in the story that include the scene where the Doctor and Leela are taken to the police station just after the coolies attacked them. So, in the scene the Doctor tells Leela to tell Sergeant Kyle what they saw and she tells Kyle "The man they were carrying was dead. They stabbed him through the heart!". Kyle however skeptically asks Leela "Really, Miss and how can you be sure of that?" and Leela firmly tells Kyle "I am a warrior of the Sevateem. I know the different sounds of death. Now put our prisoner to the torture!".

There is also the scene where Leela is interested in Litefoot's pathology examination of the cabbie who was killed and she says "You say you can tell the height of the attacker by the way the blade was thrust?  But when aiming for the heart, we were always told to strike under the breastbone!". Litefoot then looks stunned at Leela's statement and the Doctor grins and tells him "Savage! Found floating down the Amazon in a hotbox!".  

She also has an amusing scene where she eats with Litefoot at his house, but rather than use a plate, she sticks a carving knife into a cut of meat and she weighs the knife in her hand and tells Litefoot "Its a good knife!". So, as Leela starts eating it with her hands, Litefoot looks on awkwardly and Leela asks "Aren't you going to eat?" and Litefoot smiles a little and says "Yes, just going to eat" and he picks up a chicken wing and starts to eat it aswell. 

Jameson also has quite a few impressive dramatic moments such as the one where Leela is tied and placed in Greel's distillation chamber and she says "I will not plead, but know this: when we are both in the great hereafter I will hunt you down, BENT FACE and put you through my agony a THOUSAND TIMES!".

And clearly Leela struggles with the customs and social etiquette of the Victorian era more than Eliza Doolittle ever did!  And this brings to mind the story's last scene where Litefoot tries to train up Leela on the social etiquette during tea and Litefoot says "I would say "one lump or two, Miss Leela".  To which you will reply "one will suffice, thank you".  And Leela asks "Suppose I want two" and Litefoot firmly says "Oh no, no, no, no.  One lump for ladies" and Leela says "Then why do you ask me?!".      

Christopher Benjamin as Henry Gordon Jago, the pompous theatre owner, who has a large vocabulary and likes to act big, but at the same time he's a coward, who would flee at any sign of danger, but towards the end he plays his part in fighting the baddies.

Benjamin naturally has some great scenes in the story that include the one where Jago speaks to his stagehand, Casey, and says to him "I will look over those lugubrious leaniments at the crupuscular hour!" and Casey says "Eh???" to which Jago replies "See you in the morning!".

Another good scene from Benjamin is when the Doctor meets with Jago at the theatre and pretends to audition for him and Jago is very unimpressed by the Doctor tricks "Auditions start on Saturday morning, ten o'clock sharp!" and the Doctor continues to show some more and Jago continues to be unimpressed and says "Is that all?" and the Doctor says "No, dramatic rescitations, tap dancing.  I can play the trumpet in a bowl of live goldfish!" and Jago wearily says "Don't bother coming back on Saturday!".

Another good scene is when Jago first pays a visit to Litefoot and he mistakes him to be Litefoot's butler (as Litefoot is wearing an apron at the time) and Jago arrogantly says to him "Kindly tell your master that Henry Gordon Jago wishes to see him!" and Litefoot protests and Jago says "Confound your insolence, sir, and announce yourself!" and Litefoot snaps back at him telling him he is Litefoot and Jago changes tack quickly saying "Why dash me optics!  I should have realised.  That brow, those hands.  England's peerless premier professor of pathology!" then he doffs his hat at him "Henry Gordon Jago are your service!".    

And lastly there is the scene where Litefoot and Jago are being held captive by Greel and Jago admits that he isn't brave when it comes to it. So, Jago admits "Well, I'm not so bally brave when it comes to it. I try to be but I'm not..." and Litefoot says "Well when it comes to it...I don't suppose anybody is" and Jago says "Well just thought I would let you know, in case I let the side down" and Litefoot smiles and reassures Jago "You won't, Henry. I know you won't".

Trevor Baxter is also excellent Professor Litefoot, as he plays Litefoot as a plucky character, who will stand up for a fight, and his scenes with Christopher Benjamin are great, and some of the highlights of the story.

Baxter also has some great scenes that include the one where Litefoot get's ready to finish up his shift are his autopsy on the body of the dead cab driver. So, Litefoot says to the Doctor "They were both poisoned, of course. One orally, the other intravenously. I understand you suggested scorpion venom?" and the Doctor says "Yes, in concentrated form". Litefoot asks the Doctor "I'd like to hear more about that. You're in this line, I take it?" and the Doctor tells him "I dabble a bit. Dilettante" and Litefoot says "Surely more than that. I got a zoologist colleague to look at our last cadaver. It seems he thinks it's the work of a rat, too. What an amazing night it's been!" and Leela says to him "Its not over yet".

So, Litefoot continues "It's been jolly interesting, wouldn't you say? Most of the corpses around here are jolly dull. Now I've got a couple of inscrutable Chinks and a poor perisher who was chewed by a giant rat, having been stabbed by a midget!". The Doctor curious asks "A midget?" and Litefoot says "Angle of the wound. Oh, upon my soul. I'm sure we shouldn't be discussing such things in front of the fair sex. Forgive us, ma'am!". So, Leela a bit puzzled asks the Doctor "Does he mean me?" and the Doctor says "I don't think so".

Another scene is where the Doctor, Leela and Litefoot ride in a carriage and Leela questions what Litefoot is doing as he smokes his pipe. So, Leela asks "Why is there fire coming out of your mouth?" and Litefoot out of surprise says "Pon my soul, hasn't the girl ever seen a pipe before?" and the Doctor says "There's no tobacco where Leela comes from" and Litefoot says "Sounds healthy, but exceedingly dull!".   

Another good scene is when Jago goes around to Litefoot's home but is not aware of who he is and mistakes him as a servant and Jago says "Confound your insolence, sir, and just announce me!" and Litefoot says "Consider yourself announced, sir!  I'm Litefoot!".  And in the scene Litefoot decides that he and Jago should try and locate Weng-Chiang themselves and he says to Jago "If you and I keep a discreet eye on the theatre we might nab this fellow, should he return.  We might be lucky, Mr Jago.  And if we are, I have a few lumps to repay!" (referencing the fact he had been knocked out twice already!).

John Bennett is also very good as Li H'sen Chang, the enigmatic and mysterious magician, who obeys Greel blindly at first, but realises altogether a bit too late that Greel later deserts him.  Bennett also has some excellent make-up to make look like a gent from the Orient, which looks very convincing (despite the fact he wouldn't be able to move his eyebrows!).

Bennet also has some good scenes which include the scene where he arrives at the police station to help the inspector with their enquiries and the Doctor asks him "Don't I know you?  Aren't you Chinese?" and Chang says "I understand we all look the same!". So, after Chang discreetly passes the coolie a poison pill, which the coolie takes and dies from, the Doctor asks Chang "What did you do?" and Chang says "Nothing. What are you suggesting?". The Doctor then examines a tattoo on the coolie's hand and he says "The tong of the black scoprion. One of the most dangerous politico-criminal organisations in the world. Wouldn't you agree, Li S'hen Chang?". However, Chang pleads ignorance and says "You seem remarkably well-informed, Doctor. Alas, I know nothing of these matters. Most regrettable incident. Goodnight, Sergeant". And before Chang goes he turns to Leela and says to her "I'm sure we shall meet again. Perhaps under more pleasant circumstances".

Then there is the scene where Chang uses his skill as a hypnotist (along with his heightened powers learned from Greel) to hypnotise to a couple of female workers to come with him, and one of them is substituted by Leela.  And as Chang returns for them he grabs them both and says "Come!  I said come!  You painted drabs!  My master must feed!".     

Another good scene for Bennett also comes when Chang performs his live act infront of a full house in the theatre and he asks for an assistant to help him with a trick as the Doctor comes on stage, he asks him to step into a cabinet, but the Doctor is seen going out the back door as the audience laughs, Chang says "The bird has flown, one of us is yellow!".

And last of all is the scene where Chang is found in the sewers not long after he was attacked by a giant rat and he smokes opium to kill the pain and he is found by the Doctor and Leela and he says to the Doctor "I singular sight I fear.  It is too late, Doctor, and I feel no pain.  The opium". So, Chang explains how was a former faithful servant to Greel before he was dismissed by him "I lay there, Doctor, and cursed Weng-Chiang, my benefactor, who had brought me to this fate. Hatred of him gave me the strength to drag myself away. The rats had gone. I came here to destroy the false god. The last act of the Great Chang!". Chang continues "I believed in him. For many years I believed in him" and the Doctor says "It was a good act, Chang" and Chang says "Until he shamed me. I lost face. The whole theatre saw my failure".

And soon Chang begins to succumbs to his fatal wounds and says to the Doctor "Soon I shall join my ancestors. Already I can see them. They walk to greet me from the Palace of Jade. They are smiling and carry gifts of food and flowers. Now I cross the golden bridge of the gods!". The Doctor then tries to get Chang to tell where Greel's House of the Dragon is located but Chang dies before he can tell him. 

Roy Deep also makes a noteworthy appearnce as the creepy Mr Sin, the dimunitive waxwork doll, that does Greel's evil bidding, who later goes on a kill crazy rampage at the house of the dragon and at the end the Doctor pulls out his "fuse" just Mr Sin attacks the Doctor and the others near the very end.

And last of all is Michael Spice as the villanous Greel, who we never see his face until the climax at the end of epsiode five where Leela unmasks him, and we see his twisted features.  Spice plays a great villain, especially with his impressive booming voice and no doubt it would have scared many a kid back then. 

And Spice has his share of good scenes such as his first one where Chang meets with Greel in his lair underground. So, in the scene Greel is clearly weak as he coughs and moves slowly and he says to Chang "You are late!" and Chang warns him "We should not go tonight, Lord" but Greel insists "I must, every night until the time cabinet found!" and he coughs loudly. Greel then tells Chang "You must bring another linnet to my cage! The disease grows worse. Each distillation lasts less than the time before".

Chang warns Greel though as the girls keep disappearing there is the danger the police will get closer to them. So, Greel tells Chang "Bah. Those dumb-witted oxen. Chang, I have given you mental powers undreamt of in this century. You are thousands of years ahead of your time! What can you fear from these primitives?!". Chang then tells Greel about the Doctor but Greel dismisses the idea that he might be a possible time agent from the future "A time agent would not ask questions. A time agent would know!". Chang then tells Greel of the Doctor "If he troubles us further, I will deal with him personally" and Greel says "Very well. We're wasting time. Come!". 

And there is the scene where Chang brings two more girls to Greel's lair so he can drain their life essences to keep him alive. And Chang looks at the girls, one of which is Leela in disguise and Chang says "They're not the best but they will do. They're young. Their life essence is still strong" and he feels Leela's arms and exclaims in surprise "Oh, this one has muscles like a horse!". Chang says "I took what I could find, Lord" and Greel chastens Chang and says "I have given you knowledge. I have made you a leader among your fellows. All I have asked for in return is a few contemptible slatterns who will never be missed!". Greel then tells Chang to leave him to his work and after Chang leaves, Greel turns to Leela and says to her "I shall not keep you waiting long!". 

Then there is the scene where Greel activates the distillation chamber to drain the cleaning girl's life essence and Leela attacks Greel by surprise but is too late to save the girl. So, Leela manages to escape only to have Greel bang his gong to summon his large rats in the sewers and he yells "When my beauties find her, she will wish she died HERE!!".

Spice naturally has some good scenes in the story such as the scene where Jago and Litefoot stumble on his lair at the house of the dragon.  And he says to them when they arrive "So you choose to pry on the house of the dragon.  Unwise, very unwise!" and later he nearly chokes Jago to death in forcing him to try and tell him where the bag is with the time key for his time cabinet and then says "You will die later slowly!  It will give pleasure to my wolves!".

Another good scene from Spice comes when he finally has retrieved the time key and places it in his time cabinet, which runs on Zigma energy (which was said to be highly unstable and the result of Greel's deformity).So, Greel excitedly says "Perfect. Perfect! After all these years the function is unimpaired! Everything exactly as it was. The parallax synchrons fully charged, the strata tube set at maximum!". Greel then laughs maniacally and shouts "He was wrong! WRONG!! The zigma experiment was a success!!!".

And last of all there is the classic line where Greel places Leela in his distilation chamber and says "Whatever it was there will be no escape for you.  Let the talons of Weng-Chiang shred your fliiieeeessshhhhh!!".    

DIRECTOR AND MUSIC 

The story also has a notable score from Dudley Simpson, which is once again great, as Simpson, who by this time had been a real veteran score writer for the show virtually since it began (his first music score for the show was back in 1964 in the Hartnell era, Planet of Giants) and Simpson himself makes a cameo in the story as a conductor at the theatre.  Simpson's score has plenty of dramatic passages throughout and I really like the use of some of the organ music, especially when Chang is negotiating the bowels of the theatre to reach the sewer to meet with Greel.

As for the director, David Maloney does a great job here as he had already directed some of the show's most acclaimed serials such as The War Games and Genesis of the Daleks and he paces out the story very well here and keeps the action and story moving along nicely even for a six parter.  This was in actual fact the last Doctor Who story that Maloney would have directed, which was a pity given how great his serials were in the series. Maloney himself later died in 2006.

As for one amusing fact about the making of the show was that for one of the scenes show on the streets, there was one shot where a modern car was in shot.  However the production team where unable to contact the owner to have it moved, so they ended up covering it over with hay! You can spot it easily, as you see the shape of the car beneath!

FLAWS (Warning: this section may refer to spoilers!) 

As for Talons flaws???  Well its a great story but there are still the odd niggles here and there.

And the biggests flaws that can be levelled at the story is of course the inclusion of the giant rat, which is basically pretty silly, and is not menacing at all, as it just looks like a man in a mouse costume (which is pretty much what it is!).

I also felt that perhaps the story threatens choke itself on its own cleverness at times and the intellectual dialogue between Jago and Litefoot at times becomes a bit drawn out as they appear to try and outdo each other on who has larger vocabulary!  But that doesn't take away from the great chemistry they share as an unlikely duo involved in fighting crime. 

Another niggle probably comes from Greel's make-up when his face is revealed after Leela pulls off his mask as it might appear scary to young children (well maybe not today!) but it actually appears pretty silly for the most part, especially given that how can Greel speak so clearly given his twisted features! 

And as villain whilst Greel is quite effective, his ranting and raving does become a bit tiresome after a while especially as he keeps berating his coolies who are trying to do their best to find the bag holding the time key and he instead yells "You incompetent lice!  You mindless crawling dogs!".  But again these are fairly minor niggles and I'm maybe just nitpicking here (with the exception of giant rat of course!). 

Anyway that's it for the flaws. 

SUM UP 
 
So to sum up, The Talons of Weng Chiang remains one of the great classics of the original show, and one of Tom Baker's finest stories.  It was a shame that Philip Hinchcliffe decided to part company with the show at that point as his tenure on the series proved to be what quite a few fans called the Golden Age of the show.  And some might even say that Doctor Who was never the same again after that.

Right, so that's it for now and I will see you in the next post.

Till then its bye for now!

Gladiator Revisited "Are you not entertained???!!"

Well as you might have guessed my last post was of course an April fool, as I am not shutting this blog down and will still be writing new posts (or indeed revisited ones like this!).

So, for this post I have decided to dig through the vaults of my older posts and do another revisit and this one will take another look at my original review of Ridley Scott's acclaimed historical epic, Gladiator.

So, with that said, let's get our sword and armour on and step back into that Coloseum and take another look at this one...

And the usual warning is coming...

PLOT SPOILERS ARE AHEAD!!!

STORY

So the story is set in AD 180 and begins with General Maximus Decimus Meridius (Russell Crowe) of the Roman army fight and win against the Germanic forces, which ends the war on the frontier.  Maximus, who has already gained the respect of the Roman emperor, Marcus Aurelius (Richard Harris) who as a result of the victory wants him to be his succesor after he dies and end the political corruption in Rome, in spite of the fact that Marcus has a son, Commodus (Jaoquin Phoenix) whom Marcus does not approve of and sees him as being amoral.

As Marcus meets with Commodus and tells him that he will not be his successor, Commodus is deeply wounded by the news and does not take it well and ends up smothering his father to death and he takes the throne.  Commodus then asks Maximus for his loyalty, however Maximus turns him down and leaves, only to be arrested by one of his own men, Quintus (Tomas Arana) who has decided to be loyal to Commodus instead and tells Maximus that his wife and son will be executed.

Maximus however manages to escape his execution sentence after killing the Praetorian guards that hold him captive and he flees on a horse to his home in Spain, where he desparately tries to save his wife and son, but he arrives too late to find them already dead and crucified.  Maximus devastated, buries them and passes out and is soon found by a slave caravan, which takes him to Zuchabbar in the African province of the Roman empire and he is sold to a man named Proximo (Oliver Reed) and made to fight as a gladiator.

Maximus however as a gladiator proves to be a great success given his superior fighting skills he wins every match he faces and he begins to gain popularity in the province.  Maximus also makes a friend with one of the other gladiators, an African former bounty hunter called Juba (Djimon Hounsou).  As a result of Maximus's sucesses, Proximo reveals that they will be returning to Rome to the Roman Colosseum.  The timing of this is a result of Commodus who has decided in his new reign as the emperor of Rome that he will bring the games back to the Colosseum.

As Maximus and the other gladiators arrive at the Colosseum they are pitted against a group of warriors, who fight them using chariots, but Maximus again uses his military resources and leadership to upset the odds and secures a victory.  Commodus is surprised by the result of the match and he goes to meet Maximus (who wears a metal helmet to conceal his face) but is angered when Maximus refuses to tell him his name and demands he take off his helmet, which Maximus does and tells him that he will have his vengeance for the deaths of his wife and son aswell as Marcus.  Despite Commodus's wish to kill Maximus the crowd who are won over by the Spaniard, and chant for him to live, which Commodus reluctantly allows.

And from here Maximus is thrown into a fight for his own survival against the crazed and corrupt Commodus and also find a way to take his revenge and end the corruption in Rome...

THOUGHTS 

There is not much doubt that Gladiator is a very entertaining historical drama and its popularity is fairly easy to comprehend as the film offers many sequences that are thrilling as the battle scenes are so well staged and gladiatorial fights are as compelling as they are bloody.  The film's story is of course pretty much as old fashioned as it gets in its battle of good vs evil with Maximus, the moral and decent soldier in the field, who fights for the Roman empire, only to be ultimately betrayed by his own men and sentenced to death by the corrupt and amoral Commodus and he eventually manages to escape and fight his way back to Rome where he enters the Colosseum as a gladiator.

The film however succeeds very well in showing the complexity of Commodus's character as well as while he is twisted and corrupt he is also quite pitiful as he was almost cruelly shunted aside by his father and denied the throne which was rightfully his.  However Commodus is also depicted as having inappropriate and incestuous feelings for his sister, Lucilla (Connie Nielsen) who lives in fear  of her crazed brother.

PERFORMANCES AND NOTABLE SCENES (Warning: this section contains spoilers!)

As for the performances, they are excellent as the film features a fine cast.

Starting with Russell Crowe who actually gives perhaps the film least most appealing performance as Maximus, simply because his character is pretty one-dimensional but its still a pretty good one all the same.  However I have to say (and this maybe a rather unpopular thing to say!) I really do not think Crowe's performance truly merited an Academy Award for best actor as he has given much better performances in his career than this, especially the following her as gave a terrific performance in the film, A Beautiful Mind.

Despite that however Crowe does do very well with the physical side of the film as he handles the fight scenes really well as he engages in some fierce hand to hand combat and he does lend a strong presence and authority to his character.

Crowe also has some good moments in the film such as the scene near the start where Maximus addresses his men as the Roman army takes on the forces in Germania. So, Maximus says to his troops "Three weeks from now, I will be harvesting my crops.  Imagine where you will be, and it will be so.  Hold the line!  Stay with me!  If you find yourself alone, riding in the green fields with the sun on your face, do not be troubled.  For you are in Elysium (the afterlife) and you are already dead!  Brothers, what we do in life... echoes in eternity!".  And there is of course Crowe's most memorable line where he says to Quintus, his second in command "At my signal, unleash hell!".      

Another good scene from Crowe is when Maximus starts to become something of a celebrity in the desert city of Zucchabar and he takes to the arena and easily dispatches of his opponents. However as the crowd look on impressed, Maximus throws his sword at one of the spectators, which clatters against their table. So, Maximus yells "ARE YOU ENTERTAINED?!! ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!!! Is this not why you are here?!" and he looks at them with contempt and throws his sword down and spits into the sand and walks off as the crowd cheers him. 

Crowe also has the odd moment of levity in the film such as in the scene where, Lucilla's son, Lucius (played by Spencer Treat Clark) and Lucius visits Maximus who in the market and says to him "I hear you can crush a man's skull with your own hands" and Maximus says "Not a man's.... a boy's!". So, Lucius asks Maximus "Do they have good horses in Spain?" and Maximus tells him "Some of the best" and he shows the two engrave horses on his armour "This is Argento. This is Scarto. They were my horses" and he laments "They were taken from me".  

Then there is scene in the Colosseum where Maximus is forced to remove his helmet and reveal himself to Commodus. So, Maximus turns around and removes his helmet and says coldly to Commodus "My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelias!  Husband to a murdered wife, father to a murdered son and I will have my vengeance in this life or the next!".

 Another good moment is later on in the film when Maximus has been captured trying to stage a coup against Commodus.  And as Maximus is chained up and confronted by Commodus he says "I knew a man who once said that death smiles at us all.  All a man can do is small back." and as Commodus "I wonder did your friend smile at his own death?" and Maximus says "You must know, it was your father". 

Next up is Joaquin Phoenix who gives the film's best peformance as the twisted and corrupt Commodus who is both loathsome and pitiful and Phoenix deserves much credit for his complex potrayal of the immoral emperor.

Phoenix has quite a few highlights in the film, the first one that comes to mind is the scene where Commodus's father, Marcus, tells him he won't be emperor and Commodus tearfully asks who is to take his place and Marcus tells him it will be Maximus.

So, as Marcus asks "Does my decision disappoint you?" a devastated Commodus says " You wrote to me once, listing the four chief virtues: Wisdom, justice, fortitude and temperance. As I read the list, I knew I had none of them. But I have other virtues, father. Ambition. That can be a virtue when it drives us to excel. Resourcefulness, courage, perhaps not on the battlefield, but... there are many forms of courage. Devotion, to my family and to you. But none of my virtues were on your list. Even then it was as if you didn't want me for your son!".

And Marcus sighs and says "Oh, Commodus...you go too far!" but Commodus becomes even more emotional and says tearfully "I search the faces of the gods... for ways to please you, to make you proud. One kind word, one full hug... where you pressed me to your chest and held me tight. Would have been like the sun on my heart for a thousand years. What is it in me that you hate so much?!". And as Marcus pleads with Commodus and says "Commodus... your faults as a son are my failures as a father" and he opens his arms to embrace him. However as Commodus does so, he starts to smother Marcus to death and he says "I would butcher the whole world if only you would have loved me!".

Another scene is where Commodus realises that Lucilla has betrayed his trust by plotting against him with Maximus and he disguises it by telling Lucius the story of "The emperor Claudius who betrayed by those closest to him by his own blood."  And as Lucilla starts to silently cry as he tells the story to Lucius, Commodus continues "And the emperor was heartbroken.  The little bee had wounded him more deeply than anyone else could ever have done.  And do you know what happened then?  The little bee told him everything!".

Another fine scene is where Commodus taunts Maximus in Colosseum after Maximus defies him once again as he refuses to kill Rome's most prized gladiator.  And in the scene Commodus says to Maximus "They told me your son cried like a little girl when they nailed him to the cross and your wife moaned like a whore when they ravaged her again, and again, and again!".

And Phoenix's finest moment arrives in the scene where after Maximus has been captured, Commodus expresses his full intentions of his incestuous expectations for his sister to provide him with a son.  And Commodus says "And as for you, you will love me as I have loved you.  You will provide with an heir of true blood, so that Commodus and his progency will rule for a thousand years.  Am I not merciful?" and as Lucilla turns her head away, he angrily grabs her face and yells "AM I NOT MERCIFUL???????!!!!".

And last of all is the scene where Commodus having captured Maximus before he could carry out his coup to kill him, taunts him in Maximum's cell. So, in the scene Maximus says to Commodus "I knew a man once who said, "Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back." and Commodus asks in a cynical manner "I wonder, did your friend smile at his own death?" and Maximus almost with satisfaction tells him "You must know. It was your father". So, Commodus deeply wounded by Maximus's words says "You loved my father, I know. But so did I. That makes us brothers, doesn't it?". Commodus then hugs Maximus and says sharply "Smile for me now, brother!" and he stabs Maximus in his side and kisses him on the cheek and tells his men "Strap on his armour and conceal the wound". 

Which brings me to Connie Nielsen who is also excellent in her role as Lucilla, Commodus's sister and former lover of Maximus, who is forced to leave in fear of her brother and tries to resist his incestuous advances and then betrays his trust to conspire against him with Maximus.

And Connie has some excellent moments that include the scene where she tries to talk to Maximus just after Marcus has imposed his duty on Maximus to become Rome's protector but Maximus just wants to leave. So, Lucilla asks Maximus "What did my father want with you?" and Maximus smiles faintly and says "To wish me well before I leave for home" but Lucilla says "You're lying. I could always tell when you were lying because you were never good at it". So, Maximus stops and says to her coldly "I never acquired your comfort with it" and Lucilla says "True. But you've never had to. Life is always simpler as a solider. Or do you think me heartless?" and Maximus tells her uneasily "I think you have a talent for survival" and he tries to head off. However, Lucilla smiles and says "Maximus, stop! Is it really so bad to see me again?" and Maximus tells her "No, I'm tired from battle". 

Another good scene is where Lucilla meets with Maximus in a prison cell after he reveals himself to Commodus and as Maximus angrily tells her that his son and wife were crucified she denies knowledge and he grabs her by the throat. So, Lucilla tries to reason with him "I knew nothing" and Maximus yells "Don't lie to me!" and Lucilla says "I wept for them!" and Maximus furiously asks "As you wept for your father?!". Lucilla however angrily tells him "I have been living in a prison of fear since that day! To be unable to mourn your father for fear of your brother. To live in terror every moment of every day... because your son is heir to the throne! Oh, I have wept!".

Maximus then let's go of her and tells her emotionally "My son was innocent!" and Lucilla says "So is mine! Must my son die too before you will trust me?!" but Maximus feeling defeated says "What does it matter if I trust you?". Lucilla then tells Maximus "The gods have spared you. Don't you understand? Today I saw a slave become more powerful than the emperor of Rome!". Maximus however angrily tells her "The Gods have spared me?! I am at their mercy with only the power to amuse a mob!" and Lucilla tells him "That IS power! The mob IS Rome! And while Commodus controls them, he controls everything!".

Richard Harris also provides a fine performance as Marcus Aurelius the ageing emperor who is dying and turns to Maximus to succeed him as emperor.

Harris also has some good dialogue in the film such as in the scene where he tells Maximum that he wishes him to take over as the protector of Rome. And at the start of the scene, Maximus enters Marcus's quarters, who sits writing and Maximus says "You sent for me, Caesar". So, Marcus asks Maximus "Tell me, Maximus. Where are we here?" and Maximus says "For the glory of the empire, sire" so Marcus stops writing and sits back and says "Oh yes, I remember". Marcus then points to a large map on the wall and he asks Maximus "Do you see that map? That is the world which I created. For 25 years... I have conquered, spilt blood, expanded the Empire. Since I became caesar, I've known four years without war. Four years of peace in 20. And for what? I brought the sword. Nothing more".

And as Maximus tells him that his men who fought and died, died for Marcus and for Rome. However Marcus tells Maximus "Yet you have never been there.  You have not seen what it has become.  I am dying, Maximus.  When a man sees his end... he wants to know there was some purpose to his life.  How will the world speak of my name in many years to come?  Will I be known as the philosopher?  The warrior?  The tyrant?  Or will I be the emperor who gave back Rome her true self?".
 
So, after the two men talk about Maximus's home and his family, Marcus then asks to perform one more duty before he will let him return home. So, Marcus says "There is one more duty I ask of you before you do go home" and Maximus asks "What would you have me do, Caesar?" and Marcus tells him "I want you to become the protector of Rome after I die. I will empower you to one end alone. To give power back to the people of Rome... and end the corruption that has crippled it!". Maximus looks utterly stunned and Marcus asks him "Will you accept this great honour I have offered you?" and Maximus says eventually "With all my heart, no!".

Maximus then asks of Commodus and his right to rule as Marcus's heir "And Commodus?" but Marcus says "Commodus is not a moral man! You have known that since you were young. Commodus cannot rule. He MUST not rule! You are the son I should have had. Commodus will accept my decision. He knows that you command the loyalty of the army".So, as Maximus is stunned by this news, he says "I need some time, sire..." and Marcus says "Yes. By sunset, I hope you will have agreed. Now embrace me as my son. And bring an old man another blanket!".

And later in his last scene where he tells Commodus that he will not be the emperor and he pleads with his son, on his knees "Commodus, your faults as a son, are my failure as a father" and the two of them embrace and well it all goes badly right there!

Oliver Reed is excellent in what turned out to be the final performance of his career as the grouchy Proximo, a former gladiator, who now trades in using slaves as gladiators.

Reed has some fine moments in the film, and even his opening scene is funny where he get's angry with a sleazy trader (played by the comedian Omid Djail) "Those giraffes you sold me won't mate, they just stand around.  You sold me queer giraffes!" followed later as he driven in a carriage toward his home through a busy market place he moans "How long does it take to get into my own house?!".

Also in the scene where he addresses the slaves, with Maximus among them, and he says to them "I am Proximo!  I shall be closer to your for the next few days, which will be the last of your lives, than that miserable bitch of a mother who first brought you screaming into this world!  And just as your mother was there at your beginning... I will be there at your end.  And when you die - and die you shall - your transition will be to the sound of.... (claps his hands) gladiators.... I salute you!".

And later on in the scene where he talks to Maximus after his success in African province and he tells him of his memories of being a gladiator himself as he says "Oh you should see the Colosseum, Spaniard.  I was the best not because I killed quickly, I was the best because the crowd loved me.  And if you win the crowd, then you will win your freedom!". So, as Maximus agrees to win the crowd in Rome, Proximo proudly says "So, Spaniard, we shall go to Rome together... and have bloody adventures! And the great whore will suckle us until we are... fat and happy and can suckle no more. And then, when enough men have died, perhaps you will have your freedom!".

And last of all is the scene where Maximus is about to do battle again in the colossuem and he tries to tell Proximo about how Commodus has perverted Marcus's dream. And Proximo tells Maximus "Commodus knows too well about how to manipulate the mob!" and Maximus angrily tells Proximo "Marcus Aurelius had a dream that was Rome, Proximo. This is NOT it! This is NOT it!". Proximo then tells Maximus "Marcus Aurelius is dead, Maximus. We mortals are but shadows and dust. Shadows and dust, Maximus!".

As for the other supporting cast Djimon Hounsou is also good in his part as Juba, fellow gladiator and good friend to Maximus as they fight together in Africa and then later in Colosseum.  

And Djimon has some good moments that include the one where not long after Maximus and Juba have been traded in to fight as gladiators for Proximo, Maximus refuses to fight in practice and later on he sits and tries to carve his Roman guard tattoo off his arm with a sharp stone. So, Juba asks Maximus "Spaniard, why don't you fight? We all have to fight!" and Maximus ponders on this for a moment and continues to try and cut the tattoo off his arm. So, Juba asks him "Is that the sign of your gods?" and Maximus smiles and nods and Juba then asks "Will that not anger them?" and Maximus smiles and nods again.

And lastly there is the scene where Maximus and Juba talk about their families together and Juba laments that he may never sees his family again. So, Juba tells Maximus "It's somewhere out there- my country, my home. My wife is preparing food. My daughters carry water from the river. Will I ever see them again? I think no". Maximus then asks him "Do you think you will see them again when you die?" and Juba says "I think so. But then, I will die soon. They will not die for many years. I'll have to wait". And Maximus becomes emotional tells Juba "You see my wife and son...are already waiting for me..." and Juba sincerely tells him "You'll meet them again. But not yet. Not yet!" and he shakes his hand to encourage him as Maximus holds back his tears.

And lastly Derek Jacobi also makes provides a fine turn as Senator Gracchus, a roman senator who opposes Commodus's rule and often makes sarcastic remarks to him.

This is well noted in their first scene together where Commodus tells Gracchus "I think I understand my own people" and Graccus mockingly asks him "Then, perhaps Caesar will be so good as to teach us...out of his own extensive experience!. So, Commodus says "I call it love. Rome is my children and I will embrace it like it were my own" and Gracchus says "Have you ever embraced anyone with plague, sire?!" to which Commodus turns him and says "No, but if you interrupt me again, I'm sure you will!".

Another good scene is where Graccus meets with Maximus and Lucilla in private as they discuss what will happen as Maximus plans his coup against Commodus. So, Gracchus, who is a little alarmed by Maximus's plan says to him "Marcus Aurelius trusted you. His daughter trusts you. I will trust you. But we have little time. Give me two days...and I will buy your freedom. And you- You stay alive. Or I'll be dead. Now we must go!".

And last of all is the scene where Gracchus attends one of the gladiatorial showings as Maximus is about to enter the Colossuem again. So, as Gracchus sits down in the crowd, one of the senators says "Senator Gracchus. Don't often see you enjoying the pleasures of the vulgar crowd!". So, Gracchus tells the senator "I don't pretend to be a man of the people, Senator. But I do try to be a man FOR the people!".

DIRECTOR AND MUSIC 

As for the director, Ridley Scott does a great job with Gladiator as the film is visually spectacular and he effortlessly handles the staging of the film's epic battle scenes, particularly at the start and also the fight scenes in the colosseum.  Scott also makes good use of the film's locations as the opening sequence was actually filmed in the Bourne woods in Surrey, and the scenes of the desert travel and the African province were shot in Morroco, and lastly the Colosseum location was shot in Malta, where the production even built a smaller scale set of the Colosseum itself.  The film at over two and hours long never drags and Scott paces the story very well throughout as well.

And Ridley Scott was inspired to direct the film after he saw the painting titled Thumbs Down (or Pollice Verso in Italian) by the French paintor Jean-Leon Gerome, which was of a gladiator in the colosseum standing over two slain corpses.  The thumbs up and down signalling is also demonstrated by Commodus in the film as thumbs up means live and thumps down of course means die.

And this brings me onto the film's score by Hans Zimmer, which is excellent and remains one of his most memorable and recognisible scores and was also co-written by Lisa Gerard who provides the disinctive singing in the film.  The film score itself did not win an oscar although it was nominated but it did win the Golden Globe award for best original score.

FLAWS 

Now we get onto the flaws, does Gladiator have any??? Well, yes it does have a few worth mentioning. 

For starters I have big reservations about the character of Marcus Aurelias, as he comes across as a rather arrogant, presumptuous dick, who rather cruelly tells his own son that he will not become emperor.  And given Commodus's amoral nature this may well be understandable however its the manner in which Marcus shafts his son at the start and doesn't even bother to ride with him either that shows his open contempt for his Commodus.

And top it all off when Marcus delivers the devastating news to his son that he will not be emperor, he has the temerity to ask his son "Does my decision disappoint you?". Well.... DUH!! Of course he is disappointed! I mean Marcus is just SO self absorbed it is utterly unreal! Commodus has been building up to being the emperor his whole life and this was his big moment, which he had been totally robbed of. So, of course he's going to be gutted that he won't be his douchebag of a father's rightful heir to the throne!  

Not only that there is the infuriating presumption that after all Maximus has done for him that he won't even let him go back to his wife and family and insists it is he that should end the corruption in Rome instead.  I mean hasn't the guy done enough for you already????!!!!  And its the arrogance of giving Maximus no choice when Maximus says "I need time to think" and Marcus says "Of course and by the morning I hope you will have agreed with my decision". Acchh sod off you arrogant, presumptious old git!

And I enjoy looking at cause and effect in movies and it has to be said, and this is by no means a flaw, but Maximus's capture and ultimate demise actually lies with Lucius as the youngster naively reveals to Commodus while they have a playful swordfight that he is "Maximus, the saviour of Rome!".  And as Commodus looks surprised by this, he asks Lucius who told him that, and the boy whispers in his ear that it was Lucilla (presumably anyway) and Commodus later has his men ambush Maximus and capture him, where Commodus later stabs Maximus, to weaken him during their final duel in the colosseum.  And that all boils down to Lucius's flippant remark, so if only he'd kept his mouth shut then that probably wouldn't have happened.  Thanks Lucius!  

I also thought it was rather peculiar how the character Quintus, who betrayed Maximus's loyalty for Commodus's, at the end of the film switches sides and rather than give Commodus his sword, as Commodus commands, Quintus refuses and says "shield your swords!".  And this is the emperor he is disobeying!!!  Now either there are strict rules in the gladiatorial combat that once an opponent has dropped their sword they can't pick it up again (which might be so) or Quintus has committed a blatant act of mutiny!  In the end of course its the right decision and it sees Quintus acquit himself for his actions in ordering the execution of Maximus's family (which was at the hands of Commodus anyway, so he was just following orders).

Its also worth noting that the film is not the most historically accurate either but then again there are few historical epic films that truly are (I guess!) and for the most part the story of Gladiator itself is fictional. This is especially true in the case of Maximus, who is in fact a fictional character although he could have loosely have been based on the real life historical figure, Narcissus, a wrestler, who ended up strangling Commodus Aurelias in his bathtub in reality and did not take him on in a duel in the colosseum as the film depicts between Maximus and Commodus.

And lastly another historical inaccuracy in the film involves the death of Marcus Aurelias as he is shown to be murdered by his own son, Commodus as a result of denying him his right to take the throne. However in reality, Marcus died at Vindobona in 180AD from the Antonine Plague, which was said to have been smallpox or the measles and this was rife throughout the Roman empire around this time.

Anyway so that's it for the flaws.

SUM UP

So, to sum up, Gladiator still remains a highly entertaining epic historical drama, which even though it is largely fictional in the story it tells, its still a very enjoyable film featuring some great action scenes and fine performances from its cast. The film also features a very memorable score from Hans Zimmer, which was nominated an Academy Award even thought it missed out in the end to Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon by Ta Dun.

And despite any of its inaccuracies and flaws, this is still a very enjoyable experience and a film that is still worth taking a look at.

Right, so that's it for now and I will be back again sometime soon.

So, till the next one its bye fer now!

Blog Closing...For Good

Well, its been a blast doing this blog for the last 7 years or so but I think its time to call it a day as it does take alot out of me to get these posts out there given how long-winded they are and how much time it takes to do them.

So, its with a heavy heart that I have decided to shut down the blog for good this time, as I really need to focus on other things.

So, all the best to you and thanks for stopping by and reading my posts.

Adios!

Kenny.